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Peter Ajetunmobi
Graphics/ Social media manager @ Stream soft international
A pinch of jealousy is okay. But insecurity kills a relationship.
A little touch of jealousy is beautiful in romantic relationships, even God is a jealous God, but when it transcends to insecurity, it becomes dangerous and unhealthy. Insecurity is the feeling that you don't deserve someone, and that there's something you lack that those folks you see around your partner get mad about having. Insecurity is an expression of self-inadequacy and low self-esteem. For you to get insecure about your partner, you feel/know that you lack enough value to keep him/her.
When it transcends to possessiveness it is a pure indication of abuse. Some guys can’t leave their girlfriends to rest; they call on the phone and immediately ask her,” Where are you?” “Who are you with and other questions that depict insecurity.
The fact remains that possessiveness would result in abuse, possessive people gradually become aggressive and Violent, especially when their insecurity becomes too hard to bear.
Such a relationship is a prison. It is a cage. Love gives freedom. love doesn't restrict, love is free and open.
Please if you are insecure, get back to your drawing board and work on your self-worth. Stop freaking over nothing. If you are significant others found you worthy enough to be loved and committed to, why do you think they would just leave you for someone else or because of someone else?
Why do you think you don’t deserve them?
Why do you think someone else can get them?
I want you to believe in yourself. that there is something in you that is rare and is why you were chosen in the first place.
Insecurity is a disease. Treat it. It makes you suspect when there is something fishy. it doesn't encourage trust and gently a sweet relationship will turn sour.
Lastly, you can have a secure partner and make them feel insecure because of the kind of things you do and your lack of boundaries. Stop doing things that can breed insecurity in your relationship and marriage.
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