How do you avoid falling in love with the wrong person?
<p>This is a really complicated question. Part of what helps is to know who the "right" person for you is and what that looks like rather than acting on chemical attraction or shared interests/experiences. Most of the people I know who have been with the wrong person did so because that person was someone they spent a lot of time with (within the friend group, went to the same school, or workplace) or that they found "hot." While you have to be attracted to the person you're with, that isn't the only important factor.</p><p><br></p><p>For me, it was always about peeling away the stuff that won't last and setting it aside in favor of looking at core qualities that would last for a lifetime. Everyone gets old. Everyone lives their life largely outside of the public eye and will spend time in frumpy clothes with messy hair because it's ridiculous to expect them to keep up appearances 24/7. Everyone experiences setbacks in life in various ways including job changes and loss of income.</p><p><br></p><p>When I chose my husband, who I still adore and am very happy with after 35 years together, I made a list for myself of what I valued in a partner: honesty, communicativeness, kindness, being affectionate, attentive, intelligence, and "ambition" (which didn't mean he had to be driven, but just meant he had to be growth-oriented), and emotionally stable. Honesty was huge for both of us. We don't lie to each other ever - not even over little crap. People don't believe me when I say that, but it's true. That doesn't mean we're being blunt and speaking up about every little thing, but we don't lie when a topic is discussed and we talk about things which bother us.</p><p><br></p><p>I specifically didn't want someone who was a "go-getter" or wanted a big career with a ton of money because I wanted someone who would spend time with me and those things contradicted each other. One thing that is important to keep in mind is that one quality will often come at the expense of another. Someone who is attentive and affectionate probably isn't going to want to give you a ton of alone time so, if you need that, you should factor that into the equation. People can't just be there when you want them and go away when you don't. It's unfair. You also can't have someone who is in a high-powered job who also does things with you often as that doesn't work either.</p><p><br></p><p>So, I think the first thing you should do is sit down and know yourself. Write down who you are and what you want and if what you want actually fits who you really are. Ask your friends how they see you and if your version of you fits theirs (because often we aren't who we think we are). Figure out what sort of person would fit with you and look for those traits in a partner. If you're hormonally driven and tend to get fired up by someone even if they're the wrong person, then I'd suggest not getting into serious relationships until you're older and less controlled by your biology. My husband and I were lucky because neither of us were slaves to our hormones even at a young age (and I think we would both be defined as demisexual), but each person is different. If you're fueled by physical passion, have fun until you're ready to look beyond physical chemistry and don't get into anything too serious until you settle down a bit. No one is ruled by hormones forever and you'll be better able to find a good partner rather than just being with whoever turns you on.</p><p><em><sub><strong><br></strong></sub></em></p><p><em><sub><strong>I will love to see other writers view about the topic, in the comment session</strong></sub></em></p>
At the end of the month, we give out prizes in 3 categories: Best Content, Top Engagers and
Most Engaged Content.
Best Content
Top Engagers
Most Engaged Content
Best Content
We give out cash prizes to 7 people with the best insights in the past month. The 7 winners are picked
by an in-house selection process.
The winners are NOT picked from the leaderboards/rankings, we choose winners based on the quality, originality
and insightfulness of their content.
Top Engagers
For the Top Engagers Track, we award the top 3 people who engage the most with other user's content via
comments.
The winners are picked using the "Top Monthly Engagers" tab on the rankings page.
Most Engaged Content
The Most Engaged Content recognizes users whose content received the most engagement during the month.
We pick the top 3.
The winners are picked using the "Top Monthly Contributors" tab on the rankings page.
Here are a few other things to know for the Best Content track
1
Quality over Quantity — You stand a higher chance of winning by publishing a few really good insights across the entire month,
rather than a lot of low-quality, spammy posts.
2
Share original, authentic, and engaging content that clearly reflects your voice, thoughts, and opinions.
3
Avoid using AI to generate content—use it instead to correct grammar, improve flow, enhance structure, and boost clarity.
4
Explore audio content—high-quality audio insights can significantly boost your chances of standing out.
5
Use eye-catching cover images—if your content doesn't attract attention, it's less likely to be read or engaged with.
6
Share your content in your social circles to build engagement around it.
Contributor Rankings
The Rankings/Leaderboard shows the Top 20 contributors and engagers on TwoCents a monthly and all-time basis
— as well as the most active colleges (users attending/that attended those colleges)
The all-time contributors ranking is based on the Contributor Score, which is a measure of all the engagement and exposure a contributor's content receives.
The monthly contributors ranking tracks performance of a user's insights for the current month. The monthly and all-time scores are calcuated DIFFERENTLY.
This page also shows the top engagers on an all-time & monthly basis.
All-time Contributors
All-time Engagers
Top Monthly Contributors
Top Monthly Engagers
Most Active Colleges
Contributor Score
The all-time ranking is based on users' Contributor Score, which is a measure of all
the engagement and exposure a contributor's content receives.
Here is a list of metrics that are used to calcuate your contributor score, arranged from
the metric with the highest weighting, to the one with the lowest weighting.
1
Subscriptions received
2
Tips received
3
Comments (excluding replies)
4
Upvotes
5
Views
6
Number of insights published
Engagement Score
The All-time Engagers ranking is based on a user's Engagement Score — a measure of how much a
user engages with other users' content via comments and upvotes.
Here is a list of metrics that are used to calcuate the Engagement Score, arranged from
the metric with the highest weighting, to the one with the lowest weighting.
1
A user's comments (excluding replies & said user's comments on their own content)
2
A user's upvotes
Monthly Score
The Top Monthly Contributors ranking is a monthly metric indicating how users respond to your posts, not just how many you publish.
We look at three main things:
1
How strong your best post is —
Your highest-scoring post this month carries the most weight. One great post can take you far.
2
How consistent the engagement you receive is —
We also look at the average score of all your posts. If your work keeps getting good reactions, you get a boost.
3
How consistent the engagement you receive is —
Posting more helps — but only a little.
Extra posts give a small bonus that grows slowly, so quality always matters more than quantity.
In simple terms:
A great post beats many ignored posts
Consistently engaging posts beat one lucky hit
Spamming low-engagement posts won't help
Tips, comments, and upvotes from others matter most
This ranking is designed to reward
Thoughtful, high-quality posts
Real engagement from the community
Consistency over time — without punishing you for posting again
The Top Monthly Contributors leaderboard reflects what truly resonates, not just who posts the most.
Top Monthly Engagers
The Top Monthly Engagers ranking tracks the most active engagers on a monthly basis
Here is what we look at
1
A user's monthly comments (excluding replies & said user's comments on their own content)
2
A user's monthly upvotes
Most Active Colleges
The Most Active Colleges ranking is a list of the most active contributors on TwoCents, grouped by the
colleges/universities they attend(ed)
Here is what we look at
1
All insights posted by contributors that attended a particular school (at both undergraduate or postgraduate levels)
2
All comments posted by contributors that attended a particular school (at both undergraduate or postgraduate levels) —
excluding replies
Below is a list of badges on TwoCents and their designations.
Comments