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86
Abuja, Nigeria
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653
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Inherited Scars 💔
<p><br/></p><p>Have you ever stopped to notice how much of you isn’t really you?</p><p><br/></p><p>The way you flinch at raised voices, the way you apologize too quickly, the way you shrink yourself so you don’t take up too much space, that’s not your personality. They’re survival tactics. Things you picked up from growing up around pain you didn’t understand.</p><p><br/></p><p>Your parents didn’t sit you down and say, “Here, take my pain.” But they didn’t have to. You grew up watching it. Feeling it. Breathing it in.</p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe your mom was always on edge, so now you overthink everything, walking on eggshells even when nobody’s angry. Maybe affection was rare, so you chase people who can’t love you back, thinking that’s all you deserve.</p><p><br/></p><p>We don’t realize it at first, but their trauma becomes our normal. It shapes our boundaries. Our fears. Even the way we love. What they didn’t heal in themselves, they passed down — not always intentionally, but inevitably.</p><p><br/></p><p>And honestly, it’s not your fault. Trauma has a way of disguising itself as “just who I am.” But no, you’re not inherently anxious. You’re not “naturally” cold or distant. You’re not “bad at love.” You learned these patterns because someone else’s wounds bled into you.</p><p><br/></p><p>Unlearning it? That’s heavy work. It means facing the uncomfortable fact that the people who raised you, people you love, were sometimes the source of your pain. It means breaking cycles you didn’t start but are now tasked with ending.</p><p><br/></p><p>Because this pain shows up in ways we don’t always notice. It hides in how we act, how we react, what we accept. But the good news is... what you learned can be unlearned.</p><p><br/></p><p>Healing is hard. It’s facing the truth that the people who raised you also hurt you. Not always on purpose, but it still left a mark. Healing means doing the work they couldn’t do, so you don’t pass it on</p>
Inherited Scars 💔
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Mu Na®
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