Should “Age Gap” Really Be a Problem in Relationships?

Should “Age Gap” Really Be a Problem in Relationships? I see so many people judge age gap couples as odd — quick to assume one person is only there for money, status, or something to gain. But should that really be such an important discussion when we talk about love? Yes, some age gaps might seem unusual — a 68-year-old with a 24-year-old will make some people raise eyebrows. But is that really for us to decide? Or is it for them to live?--- "Well… my husband and I share a 20-year age gap.Yup — he’s 20 years older than I am. And our relationship is the safest, most loved I have ever felt with any man or any person. Even my family never loved me this much.<img alt="Safe and cherished" src="/media/inline_insight_image/1000374636.png"/>But my husband? He saved me. That 20-year gap means nothing to us. He’s taught and guided me in ways my own father never did. He’s overly gentle. He says, “I only ever want you to feel truly loved and wanted.” And that’s exactly what he does. I didn’t even realize this level of love existed until I met him — and yet he still believes he’s not doing enough for me. For me, he switches effortlessly between best friend, lover, father figure, and helper. I don’t have friends, so of course my husband is my best friend. And me?I love him sooooo much. He’s everything to me. He makes me feel safe and cherished, and in return, I show him every day that he will always be enough. When my insecurities creep in, he sits in them with me until I can see the light. When I feel like I’m “too much,” he tells me he wants more of me. He can be dominant when he needs to be, and silly when it matters.<img alt="" src="/media/inline_insight_image/1000375123.jpg"/>He’s the kind of friend who says, “If you’re down in the mud, I’ll sit in it with you.” He never downplays my fears, my worries, or even my "silly" questions. Have I dated younger men? Yes. But none of them knew the true meaning of love. My husband is different. He carries a quiet strength that comes from life experience, and now he’s teaching me so much of it — when to be silent, when to speak, and even how to smile in the face of problems. Before him, I was a silent sufferer. I never stood up for myself. I was surrounded by people, yet I always suffered alone. But now? I speak up. I stand tall. He is the healing I didn’t know I needed.<img alt="" src="/media/inline_insight_image/1000374983.png"/>A prayer I forgot to say but got answered anyway. People ask if I chose him for his money or because he’s white. No. I chose him because when I first looked at him, I fell in love with his eyes — eyes that hold history, that change from blue to green to brown. I call them “eyes like Bambi.” Charming. Enchanting. Home. How do people feel about our relationship? That’s for them to deal with. Whether it’s “right” or “proper” isn’t for anyone to judge. If you ask me, I’ll just say this: God kept him waiting so He could craft the perfect woman. And that’s me. Who cares about age gaps? That’s my soulmate. And I’m so proud of us." Maybe age gap relationships aren’t so bad. Maybe many of them are exactly where the people involved are meant to be. So what if she’s 24 and he’s 68?What if he’s the only man who could truly love her?What if she’s the only woman who could truly love him? Love is a mutual agreement between two people....<img alt="" src="/media/inline_insight_image/1000375124.jpg"/> What happens inside that relationship belongs to them. If you’re uncomfortable with it, you don’t have to understand it — just let them live in peace, without your unnecessary judgment. I'd love to take your questions and have them all answered in my upcoming series "Diary of a Black Wife"

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