The mirror only shows your reflection, not your worth

It’s Not Just the Haircut or the Lip BalmA personal story on insecurity and growing beyond it. Sometimes, the loudest battles are the invisible ones—the ones no one sees.The ones we carry in our minds, on our skin, and behind our smiles. <blockquote>Insecurity has a way of whispering lies: "Your skin isn’t clear enough." "Your hair isn't full enough." "Your legs look weird." "Your tummy’s showing again." "Your body doesn't fit their standard."</blockquote> And before we know it, we're exhausting ourselves trying to impress, when what we really crave is to belong. When I was five, I fell from a jumbo house—one of those big playground toys meant for joy.But joy quickly turned to pain.I didn’t break my legs, but the wound was deep and refused to heal.My mum was in another city at the time and couldn’t be there to nurse me. The scar stayed.And with it, something else showed up: insecurity. I began to feel afraid.Afraid of falling.Afraid of getting hurt again.While everyone else climbed and played freely, I watched from the side—trying to calculate the safest way to just be part of it all. Then came age 14.Puberty arrived with acne, and it didn’t ask permission.I’d wake up early, scrubbing my face like it was a stain I needed to erase.I wore powder so I wouldn’t sweat.I avoided people so they wouldn’t see me. At 16, it got even harder.Suddenly, my lips felt too big. My teeth too noticeable.Classmates would laugh or comment—and with every joke, I folded more into myself.All I wanted was to feel perfect… or at least invisible. I stopped joining things.I thought if I wasn’t seen, I couldn’t be judged.But deep down, I didn’t want to disappear. I just wanted to feel enough. And then came Bababelle—my best friend, my love.She was confident, bold, and beautiful—not just outside, but inside.She showed me something I had forgotten:Feeling good doesn’t come from the praise of others—it comes from the peace within yourself. We did silly things together.We laughed loudly. We pranked our teachers.People saw us together and smiled—but the healing wasn’t just in being seen.It was in finally choosing to love myself… even when the insecurities didn’t magically go away. Here’s what I know now:You are not your pimples. You are not that scar. You are not your height, your curves, or the lack of them. You are not the haircut you couldn’t afford or the makeup you didn’t wear. What truly makes you beautiful—what makes you you—goes way deeper than what people see.It’s your laugh, the kindness in your words, the way you listen, the way you love. That’s what stays.That’s what speaks when the mirror doesn’t. Love doesn’t come from how “perfect” you look.It comes from who you are when no one’s watching. So please—don’t judge yourself too much.You are growing. You are healing. You are becoming.Even if it’s quiet, even if it’s slow, it’s still real. And when you stop trying to be someone else’s idea of “enough,”you finally start becoming your own. To anyone silently battling their insecurities today—just know:You are not defined by what you see as “wrong.”You are loved. Deeply. And truly. Not for your image,But for your essence.And if you ever find someone who sees you—really sees you—even when you say nothing,hold on to that. My dear, it's rare to hear unsaid words.It takes a deep connection to feel heard when you say nothing.And it's rare. Thank you so much for reading. I’d really appreciate hearing your thoughts in the comments below 👇.

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