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The Nigeria Paradox: Why We Stan the Whites but Stress Ourselves.
<p>You know Nigerians are world champions in imported respect. The moment a white person appears in our midst, suddenly, our wahala melts like suya fat on fire. We go from lions to kittens. A Nigerian bouncer that will nearly knock you into the next generation for not tucking in your shirt will smile sheepishly and say, “Welcome sir!” to Oyinbo, even if the guy is wearing bathroom slippers and carrying plastic bag from Shoprite.</p><p>Meanwhile, you black, sweating, fully Nigerian will be told, “Young man, cut your hair, wear belt, respect yourself.”</p><p>Best example? High school. If you’re a Nigerian boy, your scalp must be shining brighter than NEPA pole, because they’ll drag you to the barbershop every two weeks. But let one white boy or half-caste show up with curly afro or Jesus hair suddenly, nobody sees it. Teachers just smile like, “Oh, it’s his culture.” Culture that is growing hair? Abeg shift.</p><p>It doesn’t even stop there. When it comes to jobs, a white man can be “consultant” with no degree, just accent. Meanwhile, you with two degrees, NYSC, and suffering will be treated like “local staff.”</p><p>And don’t get me started on church. If a Nigerian pastor sees Oyinbo in the congregation, that day’s sermon will turn into, “The nations shall come to our light.” The Oyinbo could even be an atheist, just chilling, but pastor go call him ambassador of Christ. Meanwhile, if it’s you that came late? You’re the devil’s apprentice.</p><p>It’s like we Nigerians have this mental glitch: our self-love is on silent mode, but imported validation? Maximum volume.</p><p>So here’s the thought to chew: maybe the real colonialism wasn’t in the land they took it’s in the minds we still carry. Until we start treating ourselves with the same respect we’re quick to give outsiders, we’ll keep being strict landlords to our own kids, and cheerful houseboys to strangers.</p><p><br/></p>
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