The Beauty of a Flawed Carving: Embracing Who You’ve Become

Some things in life are just not normal — or at least that’s what people make us believe. After everything you’ve been through, all the experiences that shaped you into who you are today, you step into a new place, and suddenly, someone tells you that the “tool” used to carve you wasn’t good enough. They say your habits aren’t how they should be, your way of thinking is strange, your coping mechanisms are wrong, or your way of relating to others needs fixing. Then come the extra stings — those insensitive statements people throw around without thinking:“As a girl, you act like a guy.”“As a guy, you act like a girl.”“The way you talk is weird.”“You don’t behave how you’re supposed to.” Well, forgive me — but that’s how I was brought up, and what I became after experience. Words like these might sound casual, but they cut deep. They make you question yourself, as though your entire being — the one you’ve built through life’s trials — is somehow misplaced. Well, let me tell you something: other people shouldn’t be the reason you start changing those parts of yourself. First off, you’ve already been shaped — you’ve been carved. Even if someone believes the tool used on you was “wrong,” the cuts have already been made. You’ve been formed in a way that can’t easily be reshaped or smoothed out. So, be who you are. Those unique carvings — your personality, your mindset, your way of living — are what make you you. You went through a lot to become that way. And don’t forget, it’s because of that same unique carving that someone was able to get close enough to notice your so-called rough edges in the first place. They saw your difference, your originality, and that’s what drew them in. But instead of appreciating it, they now want to file it down. That’s not how it should be. You got close to me, you saw the real me, and instead of walking away, you decided I needed fixing? Now, don’t get me wrong — I’m not talking about people who are genuinely lost or hurting, those who need help to rebuild their lives. Kudos to everyone out there helping others heal and find themselves again; may God strengthen you. I’m talking about the traits formed by simple things — the family you grew up with, the environment that raised you, the culture that molded your perspective. All those small lessons and experiences built your character, layer by layer. Sometimes, the hardest part of life isn’t just surviving — it’s surviving as yourself. Many of us have chipped away at parts of our identity, dropped habits or quirks that made us who we are, just to fit into an environment or please people who demanded that change. And yes, sometimes it even benefited us. But you should only remodel yourself when you agree — when you see that a part of your carving truly needs reshaping. Of course, some people genuinely don’t realize they need refining. Maybe they haven’t faced a situation that exposed their faults, or they’ve seen them and chosen to ignore them. Either way, be mindful of your words. Comments like “You have a bad habit,” “I don’t like that about you,” or “That’s not normal” might seem harmless to you, but they can cut deep. No one likes their flaws laid bare for others to see — not their cracks, not their chips, not their imperfections. That’s why many end up hiding behind smooth, fake covers, concealing who they truly are. But don’t lose hope. There is a way to be truly reshaped — not just covered up. A way to be made new, whole, and beautiful again. And that’s by giving your life to Christ. He knows you best — your real shape, your hidden fractures, your deepest pain. When you surrender to Him, He doesn’t just patch you up based on what others think or how you see yourself. His carving is done in love, and His touch leaves you full of peace and joy. So, embrace who you are. Appreciate your carving — every groove, every dent, every detail. And if you ever need reshaping, let it be by the hands of the One who created you in the first place.

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