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Maxwell Okikiola
A Freelancer @ I'm a writer
In Content Creators 4 min read
We are all equally beautiful, aren't we?
<p>Humans have a tendency to fabricate another level of meaning, another form of narration, or even an entirely new belief system to compensate for what they lack, or for their inability to perform certain tasks or become the individuals society, or even they themselves, expected them to be.</p><p><br/></p><p>Whenever certain people do not have enough money, they will say, “It is just their time.” Or they will say, “Those who have money are enjoying their time now. Those who do not have it will have theirs in the future.” I find that way of thinking a little unreasonable, and sometimes, deeply insensitive. Why must we create a consolation narrative simply because reality does not currently favour us?</p><p><br/></p><p>Take someone who has the ability to speak properly, someone who can construct remarkably articulate sentences and communicate in impeccable English. People who struggle with even the basic use of the language will sometimes respond, “It is not by English. It is not by speaking properly that you know whether someone is intelligent.” They will tell you, “It is not by forming big English that someone becomes smart.”</p><p><br/></p><p>And perhaps they are right in the narrowest sense. Speaking excellent English does not automatically make someone intelligent. But that does not mean the ability to communicate exceptionally well is meaningless. Linguistic ability is, in itself, a form of intelligence. Why must we diminish one person's strength simply because we do not possess it?</p><p><br/></p><p>You see a talented person, and someone will immediately say, “It is not by that.” They will find something else to elevate. You admire someone's talent, and they will tell you talent is not everything. You admire someone's beauty, and suddenly beauty is superficial. You admire someone's wealth, and suddenly money cannot buy happiness. You admire someone's intelligence, and suddenly intelligence is not wisdom.</p><p><br/></p><p>There is always another standard waiting in the wings.</p><p><br/></p><p>Even football is not spared from this instinct. Put Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi in the same conversation, and you will see it immediately. A Messi fan will say, “It is not about height. It is not about physicality. It is not about using your body to score goals. It is not even about goals.” Then a Ronaldo fan will respond, “It is not about dribbling. It is not about wriggling your way around opponents. It is not about passing the ball twenty times before scoring.”</p><p><br/></p><p>We keep moving the goalpost because we are not merely trying to appreciate our favourite person. We are trying to defend them.</p><p><br/></p><p>People will find a way to dehumanize, diminish, or invalidate what they do not have in order to elevate what they do. And I find that unsettling.</p><p><br/></p><p>Can we not simply address things as they are without fabricating another form of narration around them?</p><p><br/></p><p>If someone is beautiful, just say they are beautiful. You do not have to search for a mole on their face simply because you feel uncomfortable acknowledging their beauty. You do not have to find something lacking in them before you permit yourself to appreciate what is already there.</p><p><br/></p><p>If someone is tall, let them be tall. You do not have to make a snide remark about them being “tall as a tree” just to make the shorter person feel better. And if someone is short, let them be short. Their height does not need to be defended with an argument about how tall people have their own disadvantages.</p><p><br/></p><p>We do this with almost everything.</p><p><br/></p><p>I know you cannot judge every animal by how far it can climb. But at the same time, appreciate the animal that can climb. Appreciate the one that can run. Appreciate the one that can swim. Appreciate the one that can jump.</p><p><br/></p><p>You do not have to compare them.</p><p><br/></p><p>You do not have to contrast them.</p><p><br/></p><p>You do not have to manufacture a deficiency where there is none.</p><p><br/></p><p>Just appreciate.</p><p><br/></p><p>Because you are human, you can never be perfect. You can never be absolutely complete. You are human, and you were made with limitations, contradictions, strengths and imperfections. Perhaps that imperfection is part of what makes you beautiful in the first place.</p><p><br/></p><p>Those who can speak eloquently do not need to be talked down to because you cannot speak the way they do. Those who are talented do not need their talents diminished because you do not possess the same ability. Those who dress impeccably do not need to be mocked because their sense of presentation exposes something you have not developed in yourself.</p><p><br/></p><p>You do not have to talk someone down to feel good about yourself.</p><p><br/></p><p>You do not have to make another person's strength insignificant to reconcile yourself with your own limitations.</p><p><br/></p><p>Someone else's excellence does not constitute your failure.</p><p><br/></p><p>And perhaps that is the part we keep forgetting.</p><p><br/></p><p>Appreciating another human being does not require us to condemn ourselves. Admiring someone does not mean we have to become them. Recognizing another person's ability does not make our own abilities less valuable.</p><p><br/></p><p>There is room for all of it.</p><p><br/></p><p>There is room for the articulate and the inarticulate, the tall and the short, the talented and the ordinary, the beautiful and the unconventional, the fast and the slow, the person who can climb and the person who can swim.</p><p><br/></p><p>We are not required to possess every quality to appreciate the person who does.</p><p><br/></p><p>Appreciate nature. Appreciate talent. Appreciate beauty. Appreciate intelligence. Appreciate human beings.</p><p><br/></p><p>And when you appreciate another human being, remember that you are also appreciating something that you are: human.</p><p><br/></p><p>We are all imperfect. We are all incomplete. We all possess things that another person does not, and we all lack things that another person possesses.</p><p><br/></p><p>Perhaps we should stop treating those differences as ammunition.</p><p><br/></p><p>Perhaps we can simply look at something beautiful and call it beautiful.</p><p><br/></p><p>Look at something extraordinary and call it extraordinary.</p><p><br/></p><p>Look at someone talented and say, “You are talented.”</p><p><br/></p><p>Without comparison.</p><p><br/></p><p>Without contradiction.</p><p><br/></p><p>Without searching for a flaw to make ourselves feel whole.</p><p><br/></p><p>Appreciate human beings. Appreciate nature. Appreciate yourself.</p><p><br/></p><p>We are all beautiful in ways that do not require anyone else to become less beautiful.</p>

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