The Autism Questions We're Too Afraid to Ask

There's something I've noticed about us in Nigeria: we don't ask enough questions. Sometimes, it's because we're afraid the question might sound stupid or offensive, so we stay quiet. But every time we choose silence over curiosity, we do ourselves and others a disservice. I remember a friend who clearly wanted to ask me something about autism. He kept going around in circles, trying to find the right words. At some point, I just said, "Just ask me." Because at that point, we were both suffering, he from overthinking, me from waiting. He probably thought it was a silly or harmful question. But what he didn't realise is that his question could have opened the door to understanding. Because the truth is, if we don't ask, we don't learn. And if we don't learn, we cannot build an inclusive world.Throughout this month, we've been talking about Autism Awareness, posting, resharing, and doing our part. But there's still a huge gap between inclusion here and what we see abroad. In many places, inclusion is built into systems, schools designed for diverse learning needs, accessible public spaces, and policies that protect autistic individuals. Are they perfect? No. But they are trying.Here, we still have work to do. Employers aren't always inclusive. Many buildings aren't designed with neurodiverse humans in mind. And many schools still struggle to accept that students learn differently. We have a long way to go, but I still have to applaud some advocates for doing the work. And let me give myself some flowers too. Because if you had told me years ago that autism would become one of the greatest teachers in my life, I would have said, "God forbid," Autism didn't come with a manual. It came with trial and error. It taught my family that unconditional love requires effort, patience, and sometimes… restraining ourselves. It also introduced us to something Nigerians are very familiar with, unsolicited advice. "Have you tried this?" "Maybe it's spiritual." "Take them to my pastor." We have heard it all, and while it often comes from a place of care, what we really need is understanding. So this month and forever, don't just post- ask, learn, listen, and unlearn. Because sometimes, all it takes… is one simple question. And sometimes that question saves someone from going around in circles, like my friend and I. Take care of yourself and have a great week.

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