The eye that sees - by Big Dee

<h4>~From a drowning heart...</h4> The eyes that seethey claim you behold all people.I only hope you behold me. I am writing with enough clarity.O eyes that see, please, look my way.I am exhausted. The words have finally run dry.I simply feel too heavy to carry my own weight anymore. I never missed an appointment with you. Not once.Yet it felt as though the ledger remained blank,as if you were unaware I had even arrived,as if my presence left no shadow upon the floor. But the eyes that seeyou witness the beginning, the now, and the end.So, peer through me.Gaze past the skin and find the place where the ache resides. I was taught to surrender every thought to you.But it seems you could not read my lipswhen I clamped them shut,swallowing the indignities I refused to spit back. Did you see the gravity my heart was tethered to?Did you see it weeping, begging for a stitch? Did you see Peter?He wove lies about me to my father.He broke his strength against my back until I bled. Did you see my uncle?The sudden cruelties that arrived without cause,while those around me averted their gazeand chose the comfort of silence. Did you see me holding the fragments together?That I remained the "good one,"lugging the burdens of giants on a child’s frame,only to be branded selfish in the end?To be told I had contributed nothing? The eyes that seedid you see when they labeled me a failure?When they measured me against ghosts I could never be?When they confessed they wished I had never been born? The deceits they crafted just to buy favor.The betrayals, knowing I lacked the armor to strike back.The way they discarded meas if I were a thing that could never matter,not in this hour, nor in any hour to come. These tears taste of iron and salt.I tried. The machinery of my will has failed.I pushed until the world pushed back harder,and my arms have nothing left to give. The eyes that see, I implore you, do not look away.I am dissolving. I am fracturing.Sustain me. But. The eyes that seeyou saw Monica, too.You watched her inhabit the dark,wear sorrow like a second skin,and breathe in the sting of it. And then, you shifted the tide.You allowed her to finally taste the life she had been mourning for. I have known pain.I have housed it, carried it, and survived its weight.Now, I am ready for my turn. Rekindle my strength.I have more to offer this worldthan the misery they tried to write into my story.... The eye that sees, this I beseech thee..🥺😔🙏

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