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Conference Assistant and Event Hostess @ Bingham University
Abuja, Nigeria
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Adults Want Kids the Same Way Kids Want Pets
<p>A child sees a puppy and says,</p><p><em>“Mummy, I want one.”</em></p><p>No plan.</p><p>No study.</p><p>Just it’s cute, it’s mine, and I want it.</p><p>And isn’t that how we sometimes approach children?</p><p><em>“I want a baby.”</em></p><p>Not <em>“I want to raise a human being”</em></p><p>Just…I want a baby.</p><p>Tiny fingers.</p><p>Tiny clothes.</p><p>A face that looks almost like mine.</p><p><br/></p><p>We want <strong>the baby.</strong></p><p>Nobody talks about <strong>the person.</strong></p><p><br/></p><p>Because babies are adorable.</p><p>And People are inconvenient.</p><p>Babies don’t question you.</p><p>Teenagers do.</p><p>Babies don’t have boundaries.</p><p>Adults do.</p><p><br/></p><p>And suddenly the child you prayed for becomes the child you can’t stand..</p><p><em>“Gosh this child is Stubborn”</em></p><p><em>“This child is Disrespectful”</em></p><p><em>“This child lacks home training”</em></p><p><br/></p><p>Funny.</p><p>Where exactly did you think<br/></p><p>home training came from??</p><p><br/></p><p>We call children disrespectful after screaming at them for speaking .</p><p>Demand emotional intelligence from children raised in emotionally illiterate homes.</p><p><br/></p><p>Tell them, <em>“you better respect your elders!”</em></p><p>As if wrinkles are certificates.</p><p>Some children come from broken homes.</p><p>Others come from homes that look perfectly intact..</p><p>four walls, two parents, family pictures</p><p>and everybody inside is still bleeding.</p><p><br/></p><p>Then we meet the child who fights, lies, bites, rebels</p><p>and ask:</p><p><em><strong>“What’s even wrong with this generation?”</strong></em></p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe we’re just finally seeing</p><p>what the previous generation didn’t want to admit it created.</p><p>But honestly, wounds are explanations.</p><p><br/></p><p>Your parents may have taught you cruelty.<br/></p><p>And that explains the language.</p><p><strong>But it doesn’t excuse the sentence.</strong></p><p><br/></p><p>At some point, the abused becomes responsible for what they choose not to unlearn.</p><p>Because pain can be passed down<br/></p><p>like a family heirloom.</p><p>If only adults can simply understand that you don’t just get a baby,<br/></p><p><br/></p><p>You get <strong>a person.</strong></p><p><br/></p><p>A person who will eventually outgrow you,</p><p>disagree with you,</p><p>and remember you.</p><p><br/></p><p>So before you say,</p><p><em>“I want a baby,”</em></p><p><br/></p><p>ask the uglier question:</p><p><br/></p><p><strong>“If this baby becomes a person I don’t understand,</strong></p><p><strong>can I still love them without trying to own them?”</strong></p><p><br/></p><p>Because you don’t get to create a human being</p><p>and spend their childhood trying to create someone else.</p><p><br/></p><p>You wanted a baby.</p><p>But babies grow teeth.</p><p>And opinions.</p><p>And memories.</p><p>And eventually.</p><p>they become ….</p>
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