Score |
190
GROWING UP TOO EARLY.
<p>It wasn't one big explosion. It was more like the floorboards under our family just… rotted out.<span style="background-color: transparent;">Maybe it was the year the money got tight and every conversation was a hissed whisper behind a closed door. Maybe it was when my mom got tired , or my dad just… checked out. A</span><span style="background-color: transparent;">dult problems stopped being background noise and became my full-time job, Childhood just got quietly packed away in a box labeled ‘for later.’ But ‘later’ never came."</span></p><p><br/></p><p>My friends, They lived in a different country. They’d talk about video game lore, who liked who, the drama over a stupid group chat. And I’d nod, I’d even laugh, but it was like watching a TV show through thick glass. I couldn’t care about their problems, not really, because my problems had “consequences”. </p><p><br/></p><p>I stopped calling back. Cancelled plans last minute—‘family stuff’ became my catch-all excuse. They thought I was drifting away because I didn’t like them anymore. </p><p><br/></p><p>The truth was, I was jealous. Jealous of their lightness, their innocent irresponsibility. I resented them for not seeing the weight I was carrying, and at the same time, I was desperately protective of them. I didn't want my shadow to touch their sun. So I built a wall. Not out of anger, but out of a kind of bitter love. Now I'm on one side, 'the old soul,' and they're on the other, moving on without me."</p><p><br/></p><p>"Growing up too fast isn't about being mature. It's about performing maturity . But inside? I'm still 14, or 12, or whatever age I was when it started, s<span style="background-color: transparent;">creaming for someone to just take the wheel.</span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;"><br/></span></p><p><span style="background-color: transparent;">The biggest cost is the loss of possibility. My future isn't a landscape of open fields; it's a narrow, urgent path. It’s ‘what job can I get that provides stability?’ not ‘what dream do I want to chase?’ I miss making mistakes that don't matter. My mistakes have always mattered. It makes me cautious, older than my years in all the wrong ways, and painfully young in others.</span></p><p>I never got to practice being carefree, so now I don't even kno<span style="background-color: transparent;">w how to start.</span></p><p><br/></p><p><br/></p>
158
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