In your next life would you still want your mom?

In all honesty, My answer is... no. Not because she wasn’t a good mom, but because she’s not the mom I need. Hi... my name is Hannah salamaniAs you all know me, I am funny, obviously 🤷‍♀️... sweet. Charming as hell, and also I’m a spec hehe in Cardi B’s voice. Now, back to the subject of the matter: “In another life, would I want my mom?” Like I said, my answer still remains no. Not because she’s not a good mom she’s a great mom, trust me but she’s not the mom that I need. My reasons are... Firstly:You know that saying that goes like this: "the saddest people laugh most."Yep, that’s me. In as much as I have very, very unique qualities duh , the truth is... I am sad. It’s funny, right? 😅 I’ve been battling with depression since I was 18. Yes, 18. It started because of a heartbreak from a guy she warned me about, and when the heartbreak happened, I blamed myself. I had no one to talk to. Not even my sister. She was there, but not in the way I wanted. Then there’s my mom. I needed a mom’s comfort. Not because I wanted to tell her how I felt, but because I just needed my mom. That warmth. That closure. Lol, I couldn’t get it. And the moment I try, she becomes so judgmental. She’s one of the reasons I can’t openly express how I feel. I’d rather stay quiet. Another reason is:My own mother has termed me a “failure.” Yep. She said it three times. This was around March 2022. I was still struggling to cope with school and everything else. I needed my mom, but yeah... that’s what I got instead. Another reason is:When it comes to taking sides lol, leave it. My mom does it a lot. And guess what? She’s part of the reason why, till today, my sisters still do not understand the difference between respect and being playful. There’s this thing people say when it comes to first daughters: "Oh, you’re the senior. Try to endure."For the past 22 years of my life, I’ve been enduring the shit. Sigh. I might be that “happy Hannah” you see, But deep down, I’m broken as f**k. I’m practically losing my mind. It’s not even a joke 😂😂💔 All in all,All I just want is a mom. The only thing that consoles me is an imaginary friend in my head. I have a lot of people around me, but... genuinely, I still feel alone. Very much alone. But either way, I still wish her the best in another life. And I genuinely hope we do cross paths as strangers.

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