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37
July 14✨
<p>Today is my birthday.</p><p><br/></p><p>I was so excited to celebrate it.</p><p><br/></p><p>But somehow, it ended the way it always seems to.</p><p><br/></p><p>With tears.</p><p><br/></p><p>With sadness.</p><p><br/></p><p>The painful part is knowing I have to wait another 365 days before this day comes around again, hoping maybe the next one will be different.</p><p><br/></p><p>Seven years ago, birthdays meant something else.</p><p><br/></p><p>My mum would wake me up by tickling me until I laughed. Then she’d pray over me for what felt like forever. She never had much, but with whatever little she could afford, she made sure I never spent my birthday feeling unloved.</p><p><br/></p><p>Today…</p><p><br/></p><p>Of all the days people could have chosen to raise their voices at me, they chose my birthday.</p><p><br/></p><p>The worst part?</p><p><br/></p><p>It wasn’t an accident.</p><p><br/></p><p>They knew exactly what they were doing, because they also knew how it would end.</p><p><br/></p><p>A simple, “I’m sorry.”</p><p><br/></p><p>And somehow, I’m expected to move on.</p><p><br/></p><p>It wasn’t just one person.</p><p><br/></p><p>Or two.</p><p><br/></p><p>Three different people picked the perfect day to remind me how little my feelings seemed to matter.</p><p><br/></p><p>My mum would never have done that.</p><p><br/></p><p>No matter how angry I made her, she would never have let my birthday become another painful memory.</p><p><br/></p><p>But maybe I’m just not that important.</p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe that’s why it’s so easy for people to hurt me and expect an apology to erase it all.</p><p><br/></p><p>The usual happened.</p><p><br/></p><p>They said, “Sorry.”</p><p><br/></p><p>And somehow, that’s supposed to fix everything.</p><p><br/></p><p>I’m tired of this cycle.</p><p><br/></p><p>I used to have the smallest piece of hope to hold onto.</p><p><br/></p><p>Now…</p><p><br/></p><p>Nothing.</p><p><br/></p><p>Just nothing.</p><p><br/></p><p>I got a butterfly tattoo as a promise to myself.</p><p><br/></p><p>A promise that I would keep choosing tomorrow, even on the days that hurt the most.</p><p><br/></p><p>Tonight, that promise feels heavier than it ever has.</p>
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