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Tobi Igbinedion Co-founder @ TwoCents
city Lagos, Nigeria
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In Relationships 2 min read
But you said you LOVED me!
I have to be honest, I picked up lots of my beliefs as regards how loving someone should operate from movies such as The Titanic, Prison Break and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - oh, how could I forget, The Notebook by Nicholas Spark. I had seen it to be an intense feeling of vulnerability, one that plunges deep within your soul and leaves you at the mercy of the one your heart latches unto. It's reason why after my ex, all I could think of was "But you said you loved me". Unlike what many expect, I knew that loving someone or being in a relationship would not always be rosey. Infact one of the things that causes a break up in many relationships is the expectation that it's all supposed to go well - "If we are meant to be together, then there should be no rough edges", lies!, As long as it involves two humans, there would be friction, however it's the misunderstanding in themselves that are meant to toughen your resolve and deepen your convictions. I do not refer to values compromises - when you spot a red flag, you should indeed take heed. However I refer to behavioral differences or certain preferences, after all, you didn't expect to get married to another you, init? But here's the thing, when you get to that point where you tell someone you Love them, you are opening up yourself to bear a responsibility. Humans are so fickle they can't even see this. I love you means I have seen your shortcomings and I am ready to bear with them. I'm emphatic about this because the excitement over your partner would NOT ALWAYS be there, that's where commitment kicks it. There are times you'd wish you were alone, it's absolutely normal, however this shouldn't make you question your decisions. You love someone for the times you don't even feel like you like them anymore. Read the last statement again 🤗
But you said you LOVED me!
By Tobi Igbinedion
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