I don't think you love Him (part 2!)

It was 2 am, and Sade had reached that point in slumber that would make you think she was a corpse. “Where is my debit card?" she called out in her sleep. Her words were as clear as those of someone awake. But if Sade was wacked in the head with a sledgehammer, would she even flinch? Farts, snorts, and the carbon dioxide of an exhausted female body filled the room, and something else too. This person was present here just as much as where Sade was right now. In Sade’s dream, her eyes opened at the taste of something sweet. Sweet like cotton candy, the kind you taste with your memory. It was the taste of her debit card. She looked up and saw a man. A familiar man. Intriguing as He was, she needed to find her debit card; the thing He said she was missing. Sade looked left. Sade looked right. Then, she looked up again. “You didn’t answer me. Where is it?” she asked the man. “Stay a while. You don’t need it right now,” He said. “I do!” she screamed. So much, the sky above them cracked. “It was… sweet. It’s not sweet anymore. I need it to be sweet again!” The man stared at her without a word. His gaze mirrored her greed; exposed it. His eyes puzzled Sade. Not because of the conviction, but because she could swear she’d swum deep in those eyes before, even let herself drown in them. “Sade…” He called, breaking the silence. “How have you been? Is your heart better?” he continued. black and white abstract painting Photo by Pavel Danilov on Unsplash She lowered her gaze to her chest, where the heart lies. But what she saw was porous and decaying. Eyes watery, they couldn’t make sense of it, or the hand He stretched out to her, or the knowing look He constantly had. “Let Me help you, Sade.” Then it clicked. His voice finally took the veil off her eyes. “Abba!” she cried, falling to the ground. She knew who He was. ‘How couldn’t she?’ she thought. Hot tears drenched her cheeks as that man lowered himself, lifting her chin to meet His gaze. “Child. I miss you.” He stretched out his hand to hold her heart. And Sade waited. She waited for Him to fix it; to fix her. But then, her throat clenched when she remembered. She remembered a time when she didn’t worry about anything. And she could smile. She was happy! When’s the last time she was actually happy? Its sweet taste was on the tip of her tongue. If only she could find it now. “GIVE ME MY DEBIT CARD!” she screamed. Then the sky caved in on them. Until the debris and smoke, Sade didn’t realise they were in a field. She dusted her hair and shoulders before her eyes met the shadow-figure before her. “Who… who are you?” she asked. “Providence,” it replied. “Why are you here?” Silence fell like a sledgehammer after her words. Suddenly, she was conscious of her breathing, her heartbeat. It stared at her. Even without eyes, she knew it was staring. “You rejected Him. All of Him. Of all He is, you only wanted me,” it suddenly said. Sade’s eyes searched the void she was in for even just a glimmer of that man, of her Abba. “He’s away,” it said. “Where you wanted him to be.” “Who are you!?” she yelled in fury. “What do you mean I rejected Him? I would never!” Providence inched closer to Sade, crouching over to look down on her, while she trembled from the shortened distance. “Answer me,” she demanded. With what looked like a smirk, in a low voice, it replied, “I’m your debit card.”

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