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Felix Grace
Student, Artist and Writer @ Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria
Men Don’t Cry — Why?
<p><br></p><p><br></p><p>The phrase “men don’t cry” has echoed through generations—not just as a cultural cliché, but as a deeply ingrained social expectation. From a young age, boys are taught to "man up," to hold back tears, and to wear stoicism like armor. But why?</p><p>This isn’t merely a matter of biology. While studies show that women report crying up to five times more often than men on average, the disparity is largely shaped by social conditioning rather than emotional capacity. Men are not less emotional—they’re just less permitted to show it.</p><p><br></p><p>Yet history tells a different story. In John 11:35, the shortest verse in the Bible, we read: “Jesus wept.” The Son of God, revered by millions as the embodiment of strength and divinity, shed tears publicly. If Jesus could weep, why have we silenced our own sorrow?</p><p><br></p><p>In medieval times, knights—symbols of bravery and valor—were known to cry when departing from their beloveds. Kings, conquerors, and generals did not hide their tears in moments of grief or profound emotion. Weeping was not a sign of weakness; it was a sign of being fully alive.</p><p><br></p><p>So where did all the tears go?</p><p><br></p><p>They’ve been buried beneath generations of toxic masculinity, under phrases like “real men don’t cry” and “toughen up.” Society has traded emotional vulnerability for a false sense of invincibility.</p><p><br></p><p>And yet, the consequences are clear. Repressed emotions often lead to mental health crises. Depression and suicide rates among men remain alarmingly high, and part of the reason is this emotional suppression. We're taught to be strong—but strength without expression becomes a silent prison.</p><p><br></p><p>It’s time to rewrite the script.</p><p><br></p><p>Crying is not a weakness. It's a release. It’s the body’s way of processing pain, love, loss, joy, and relief. To cry is to be human. To allow emotion is to allow healing.</p><p><br></p><p>Let’s remind ourselves—and teach the next generation—that tears are not a threat to manhood. They are evidence of it.</p><p><br></p><p><br></p><p><br></p>
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