TwoCents | THE IMPOSTER WITHIN - by Jefferson Nnadiekwe

Whenever I am about to share an insight, I fight a little hesitation that pops up. It pops up because I start to think if what I am about to put out here is good enough. Unfortunately, it's not peculiar to this platform or short articles. I take on commissioned script writing jobs and whenever I am about to turn in the finished work, guess who appears - Mr. Hesitation. As usual we do our little dance and I defeat him then go ahead to submit the work which is mostly accepted with high commendation. You'd think the number of positive reviews my works get would have finally slayed Mr. Hesitation, but nope! He keeps coming back and the cycle continues. You may or may not be wondering why this skepticism keeps recurring each time. I did too, atleast before I knew of what is known as 'Imposter syndrome'. To explain it as plain as I can, imposter syndrome is a feeling of self-doubt, anxiousness and dissatisfaction usually associated with creatives and artists (not to say that every other person is incapable of experiencing it). Simply put, imposter syndrome robs you of the gratification you should experience in your career. People experiencing imposter syndrome often feel like whatever they do isn't good enough. In my own experience, sometimes I think whenever people give positive reviews or acceptance of my work, they are just being nice and trying not to hurt my feelings. Of course this does not happen all the time - there are times I know for a fact that I have just created a masterpiece. Unchecked, imposter syndrome is the biggest obstacle to career growth and development. Because you feel like you do not belong in a certain environment, you tend to pass up available opportunities as well as going as extreme as hoarding your work. Again, I know this because I too once hoarded my works. I was scared that putting it out there would expose the 'fraud' I thought I was. That however was when the self doubt was at its peak. Luckily I was able to shake it off and started sharing the things I created. Imposter syndrome isn't peculiar to upcoming creatives by the way. You'd be surprised to know how many of your favorite celebrities secretly fight this fiendish feeling. Famous people like Lupita Nyong'o, Emma Watson, Tom Hanks and even the Michelle Obama have shared stories about their struggles with imposter syndrome. According to Michelle, her imposter syndrome 'never goes away'. It is a common mistake to assume that success erases imposter syndrome. While it might be the case for a group, to others; the more successful they become, the more they fight this horrible phenomenon. This is because imposter syndrome tells you that you do not deserve what you have achieved, or rather; you achieved all of it through sheer luck. So we know that this thing is horrible, the next agenda is how do we overcome it? Frankly, I do not have the definite answer you are looking for as I myself am still finding my way around it. A tip though, is that you should learn to embrace your success. Whatever you achieved, you did because you put in the work and you are good at it. When people say good job, don't think of it as them being nice - you have actually done a good job worthy of commendation. Another one is to challenge the negative thoughts. So you are working on an art piece, and a little voice in your head is telling you that it sucks or it isn't the next big thing you hope it is. Instead of wallowing in that thought and quitting, strive to prove it wrong. Use the negative thoughts as a driving force to inspire you. Keep going at it! The goal of imposter syndrome is to make you quit, don't let it.  If you have any more tips that you consider helpful to anyone dealing with imposter syndrome, kindly share. You'd be doing a world of good with your advice.

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