True
Feed
CareerHub
NEW
Earnings
Sessions
Spaces
Post insight
About
FAQs
Contact
Terms of Use and Privacy Policy
Login
Create account
Earnings
NEW
How to earn on TwoCents
Rankings
CareerHub
NEW
Feed
Sessions
Spaces
About
Contact
FAQs
Terms of Use
Login
Create account
1130;
Score |
96
Ofonime Koko
CYBER SECURITY SPECIALIST (IN TRAINING) @ TD AFRICA (TECHERDEMY)
Lagos, Nigeria
341
431
58
37
In
Relationships
•
2 min read
•
Mar 13, 2025 15:57p.m.
The Unspoken Hierarchy of Friendships: Who Gets the Tea and Who Just Gets a ‘Hey’
Listen to this Insight
<p>Have you ever wondered why you spill your heart out to one friend but hesitate with another? Why some friendships feel like an open book while others remain carefully edited? I know I have—and not just because I’m a master of overthinking.</p><p>In every friend group, there’s always that one person who becomes the default confidant—the one who knows all your secrets, irrational fears, and that one embarrassing thing you did in 2017. With them, opening up feels effortless. You can send a voice note at 3 a.m., knowing they’ll listen without judgment. (Although, let’s be real—if they are judging, they’re probably rehearsing their ‘I told you so’ speech.) </p><p>But then there’s another friend, someone you care about just as much, yet you hold back. You tell yourself, They’re probably busy. They might not understand. And so, the message remains unsent. </p><p>Why does this happen? Why do we emotionally dump on some friends at 3 a.m. while giving others the "everything’s fine!" treatment, even when life is clearly on fire? </p><p><strong>The Friendships That Feel Like Cozy Blankets </strong><strong>The Friendships That Feel Like Cozy Blankets </strong></p><p>A big reason we confide in certain friends is the emotional safety they offer. With them, vulnerability doesn’t feel like a risk—it feels natural. There’s no fear of being misunderstood or seen as a burden. It’s like having a permanent get-out-of-judgment-free card. </p><p>With others, there’s hesitation. Maybe it’s uncertainty. Maybe it’s fear of judgment. Or maybe it’s just habit—we’ve never tested those waters, so we assume they won’t be as welcoming. But by holding back, we might be keeping a great friendship from growing into something deeper. </p><p><strong>Friendship Grows When We Let I</strong><strong>t </strong></p><p>Deep connections don’t just happen—they’re built. If we always turn to the same person, we never give others the chance to show up for us. That friend we hesitate to reach out to? They might be more supportive than we realize—if only we let them. </p><p>So here’s a challenge: Think about your friendships. Who gets the unfiltered, 3 a.m. voice notes? Who only gets the “I’m fine” version of you? And why? </p><p>A deeper connection might be just one conversation away—and it could change everything. So go ahead—take the leap. You never know which friendships might deepen in the best way.</p><p> </p>
The Unspoken Hierarchy of Friendships: Who Gets...
By
Ofonime Koko
Your browser does not support the audio element.
Play
0:00
/
0:00
Samuel Ibok
connection
friendship
besties
family
Send tip
7
54
4
follow
Other insights from Ofonime Koko
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
Smiling: The Free Gift That Keeps on Giving
Career and Jobs
Ever had a day so rough that you spent two hours in Lagos...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
My Pet Peeves: Don’t Touch Me (Unless It’s a Hug)
People and Society
At a time in my life, I thought that “pet peeve” meant “y...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
Math, Medicine, and a Dash of Confusion
Career and Jobs
Back in secondary school, I was that rare breed - good at...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
The Heart of Kindness: Finding Joy in Giving
People and Society
Is there anyone in the world who has never experienced k...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
When in Rome… (But What If You’re More of a Lag...
Beauty, Fashion and Lifestyle
Have you ever noticed how people say, “You become the...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
The Great Pre-Marital Dilemma: Love, Lust, and ...
Relationships
Let's be honest—dating in today's world feels like solvin...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
I Wish I Had a Bigger Inner Stomach: My Struggl...
Beauty, Fashion and Lifestyle
I know this might sound like a rich person complaining ab...
Ofonime Koko
Lagos, Nigeria
Love in the City of Hustle: Finding Romance in ...
People and Society
Lagos, a city known for its fast-paced and often chaotic...
Insights for you.
Tobi Igbinedion
Co-founder @ TwoCents
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
But you said you LOVED me!
I have to be honest, I picked up lots of my beliefs as regards how loving someone should operate from movies such as The Titanic, Prison Break and ...
1179 views
9 upvotes
8 comments
Mwambo Kate
COO @ Enchird Technolog...
Yaoundé, Cameroon
Relationships
Instead of replying with ''I KNOW..''' tr...
When it comes to how we communicate, we so often default to habitual ways of replying, without being aware of the impact it has on others. Som...
955 views
9 upvotes
11 comments
Mwambo Kate
COO @ Enchird Technolog...
Yaoundé, Cameroon
Relationships
RESENTMENT IS A SILENT KILLER.
So, I’m definitely not a coach but here is my Twocents on handling resentment in relationships effectively that I’ve learnt over time . I’ve not...
701 views
4 upvotes
2 comments
Samuel Ibok
Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling...
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
Tables, chairs, and benches.
My mom claims my dad couldn't resist her when he first saw her. I think it's called love at first sight. She carry am go where he no know. She equa...
691 views
4 upvotes
3 comments
Queensley Okon
Information Officer @ Covenant University
Ota, Nigeria
Relationships
IT'S ELEMENTARY, WATSON
For those of us who favour series that make us think or just have a love for detective stories, you would appreciate Elementary. Elementary is a...
671 views
6 upvotes
3 comments
Samuel Ibok
Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling...
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
Before I do
I come to you today as a preacher of love, the liquid metal, and the Idaboski pahose! I want to lend credence to an idea common to most people ...
635 views
4 upvotes
0 comments
Emaa Ezeifeka
Media Relations, PR and Social M...
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
Is There Someone else ?
“Is there someone else ?” Is one of my favorite songs from The Weeknd. My ex boyfriend and I got to that point in our relationship where we asked ...
594 views
5 upvotes
2 comments
Samuel Ibok
Marketing Supervisor @ Crusader Sterling...
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
There's Someone Else
Hey you, I know that feeling. I know that you know that I know that you know! Yeah, she's great, and you want her. You want all of her. She's every...
588 views
5 upvotes
2 comments
Jefferson Nnadiekwe
Freelance scriptwriter and creat...
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
APATHY: THE MOST POTENT FUEL IN THE OBNOXI...
There is a gender war going on, and I believe by now everyone is aware of this. To those however who are not aware, a trip to social media is m...
587 views
4 upvotes
1 comment
Tobi Igbinedion
Co-founder @ TwoCents
Lagos, Nigeria
Relationships
Aya Mi (My wife)
A colleague recently mentioned that finding true love in this day and age is quite a task. Whilst I have no doubts that he has spoken from his very...
584 views
4 upvotes
1 comment
×
Comments
Share thread
Refresh
×
cancel
Home
Feed
Earnings
CareerHub
Menu
What is TwoCents?
×
×
Share this post in your online circle.
×
Copy link
Twitter
Facebook
LinkedIn
Whatsapp
Share this post in your online circle.
×
Copy link
Twitter
Facebook
LinkedIn
Whatsapp
×
Insights
Views
Upvotes
Comments
Contributor score
WELCOME
TwoCents is a knowledge marketplace for Africans around the globe.
TWOCENTS
TwoCents offers you a unique opportunity to write and earn from your content, in an AI-first world.
COMPLETE YOUR PROFILE
Add your City, Bio, Phone Number, Occupation etc.
BUILD YOUR CONTRIBUTOR SCORE
Write insights, share in your network, build your score.
GET VERIFIED
Get a 100+ score, complete a 5-week streak, become verified.
TIPS
Get tipped for your free insights/content
SUBSCRIPTIONS
Receive subscriptions from your most loyal readers.
AD REVENUE
Get a share of what brands pay to advertise on your insight pages.
HELP GROW TWOCENTS
Read, tip and subscribe to content you find informative or interesting.
Q&A SESSIONS
Check out some Q&A sessions, drop a question, comment, share etc.
WELCOME TO THE COMMUNITY
Write. Share. Earn
Previous
Next
Close
Share this post
×
Copy link
Twitter
Facebook
LinkedIn
Whatsapp
Share this post
×
Copy link
Twitter
Facebook
LinkedIn
Whatsapp
×
Hi there!
To share an insight on TwoCents, you need to have an account.
If you already have one, simply login/sign-in.
Incase you don't yet have an account, click the 'sign-up' button below.
Login
Create an account
×
Oops!
Looks like
isn't setup to receive tips.
Be sure to check back later!
Close
×
Oops!
Looks like you have not setup your account to send and receieve tips.
No worries!
Click here to add your card details
Be sure to contact us if you have any questions!
×
Let
know you love
their content by sending a tip!
Show support.
Support beyond an upvote, comment or share.
Help grow TwoCents.
Encouraging other writers ensures quality insights.
Send Online
Copy tip link
Close
×
Subscribe to
's
premium insights.
Go premium.
Choose between a monthly, quarterly or yearly subscription.
Help grow TwoCents.
Every subscription encourages the contributor and ensures quality insights.
Send Online
Copy sub link
Close
×
Oops!
Looks like
isn't setup to receive subscriptions.
Be sure to check back later!
Close
↑