A Month of Me and Me.

“To sum up this month of September, what can I say I learnt?

I learnt to fear the unknown a lot and it got me thinking whether I am ready mentally and aptly for unforeseen events? Or do I just plan a bad future and expect it to happen and say, “ohh I knew it would happen. I have foresight.

I’m completely damaged in this area and I’m not improving. Frankly speaking, no improvement at all.

But I will say something, never feed yourself with that much foreboding and have it in mind that be prepared for the worse.

Maybe that’s what I was doing.”

“What else?”

“I became way too pensive and it makes my heart ache. Not meant to be figuratively.

I haven’t had time to allow certain things to be a part of me, especially goodness and hope. Those abstract feelings were not important to me as far as I am concerned.”

“Any salt to this story?” 

“Other than applying it to wounds that never occurred, nothing savory.”

“What lies would you prepare?”

“What lie should I say? I want pity and the comfort when I say I tired but deep down, fear to try didn’t make me try. Instead I cry inside. So, I will say it like I really tired.”

“Does that help anyone?”

“Honestly… hmm no. One shouldn’t be that selfish. I was even yelled at for being quiet and that my quietness was self pity and selfishness. Yes I wanted it, I felt unwanted and not taken care of. You see me but you don’t see me at. I need some attention. Like really, I don’t think you understand me.”

“Let’s move away from sentiment. You are fine. Just exercise management.”

“Okay, but I think they love me.”

“Of course they do.”

“Oh, I am expectant.”

“Of?”

“The time will come. I am trying to build a good name for myself through skills and leadership roles and the former seems unsure. I feel it may not be in my favour, you know?”

“Let’s see how that turns out okay?”

After much evaluation, his therapist looked and smiled at him.

“You are fine honestly.”

“I feel mucky inside. Like darkness keeps getting dark and the weight feels heavy. I feel I’m going to fail and not make it through.”

“Frankly speaking, you are all coming together like a jigsaw.”

“What’s the diagnosis?”

“All I can say is to meditate on Matthew 6:34. One sweet medicine.”

“Okay, what’s the diagnosis? You didn’t ask much and you already know.”

“That’s my job but If really want to know, well……”

I love endings like this.

Can you be the doctor for this patient?