Imagine you wake up early in the morning. Your phone isn't charged, and you find it difficult to make a living. You have ₦37 in your account, your landlord has been calling since 5:30 a.m., NEPA has decided to flex their powers by withholding power from you.

You go to the bathroom to brush your teeth, only to discover that there is no water. The little water you manage to squeeze out of the tap is brown. You decide to manage it because, at this point, even your toothbrush deserves to suffer with you.

You check your WhatsApp. Your class group has 247 unread messages. Your lecturer has dropped an assignment that is due in two hours. The same lecturer who has not attended class in three weeks. Your course rep has also sent a message saying, "Please, let's take this seriously."

Take what seriously, sir? My suffering?

You decide to step out and buy something to eat. The woman selling akara tells you that the price has increased. You ask why, and she says, "My brother, everything is expensive." You buy ₦200 worth of akara, and she gives you three pieces. Three! You were just seven steps away from there when you noticed that the nylon that held the akara was unusually light.

You bend down to see that you're holding nothing but a torn black nylon. Your frustration held you tight in the chest.

On your way back, a danfo driver and conductor decide that you look like someone who has money to waste. They charge you double. You complain, and the conductor asks if you want to trek. You look at the sun, look at your shoes and you somehow get angry that your ancestors didn't make enough sacrifices.

You finally get home, only to discover that the landlord has sent you a message:

"Good morning. This is a gentle reminder that your rent is due."

Gentle reminder ke? Is this how gentle reminders work?

At this point, you begin to wonder whether the universe has a personal vendetta against you. Yet, the only thing growing in your life is the number of problems.

You get so overwhelmed that you begin entertaining thoughts of ending it all. But even then, the universe has other plans.

You remember the story a friend told you about a lady who announced on Twitter that the place where she intended to commit seppuku was locked because someone else had already died there. The comments were even more hilarious. Someone said the suicide forest was probably locked by the time it got to her turn.

You had laughed at the story, but now you are beginning to wonder whether the universe has a particularly wicked sense of humour.

Anyway, back to your own predicament. The rope you somehow managed to acquire with your last card turns out to be fake. You discover that it is some decorative nylon material that cannot even hold a curtain properly.

You sit there, staring at it. Even your own misery has been scammed.

You start laughing. Not because anything is particularly funny, but because what exactly is going on? Is this a prank? Is there a hidden camera somewhere? Has someone registered you for a reality TV show without your consent?

You eventually call a friend, who comes over, listens to you and insists that you both go out to get something to eat. Somehow, you find yourself laughing about the entire day.

Sometimes, life throws so many lemons at you that you begin to suspect that you have been employed by a citrus company without your knowledge.

But one thing is certain: when life gets that ridiculous, Hold on till the next day. The suicide forest is closed.

There is still a tomorrow, and who knows? Maybe NEPA will bring light tomorrow .

Although, let's not get too ambitious.😪