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175
Crucible
Lead Architect @ Enigmaking
Lead Architect @ Enigmaking
Boundaries
<p>The word sits heavy in some people’s mouths. They hear it and flinch. They refuse its honest weight.</p><p><br/></p><p>Let’s start with the plain definition: A boundary is a real or imaginary line that marks where something ends and something else begins.</p><p><br/></p><p>Hold those last words carefully. </p><p><em>Where something ends. </em></p><p><em>Where something begins.</em></p><p><br/></p><p>That is the entire point.</p><p><br/></p><p>As we get older, we start drawing those lines more deliberately-with friends, with family, with lovers, with the world. We stop pretending we can be endlessly available. And that is when the friction begins. Some people treat any limit as a personal insult. They call you “extra.” They act wounded. A few even punish you for having the nerve, responding with the classic, “Ah ah, you are being too strict” or “Omo, try and be flexible” always at your expense.</p><p><br/></p><p>There is a difference, though, between healthy boundaries and rigid stubbornness. Boundaries are knowing when a situation needs flexibility and when it does not. Being extra is refusing to move an inch, no matter the cost. One is self-respect. The other is just ego wearing a mask.</p><p><br/></p><p>Family is often the hardest place to hold the line. Blood is used as a blank cheque. “We’re family” becomes the reason you should keep absorbing discomfort, drama, or entitlement. When you finally set rules of engagement, they look at you like you’ve lost your mind. As if adulthood suddenly makes basic self-protection weird.</p><p><br/></p><p>But we grow tired. Tired of swallowing everything for the sake of peace. Tired of performing closeness we no longer feel. That exhaustion is not bitterness. It is clarity. And clarity demands space, limits, and the quiet courage to keep them.</p><p><br/></p><p>Or you run the risk of being a Federal Highway.</p>
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Port Harcourt, Nigeria
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