Dear Becomer, Breathe.

In your 20s, you should have achieved this.

In your 20s, you should have known this.

At 21, you should have had your master's degree.

At 22, you should have known who you want to marry.

Oh, please, can you just rest and let me breathe? 😭

Maybe that was too harsh, but seriously, stop putting unnecessary pressure on yourself.

Well, hi, friends... 🤭

This particular subject matter has been sitting in my heart for a short period of time, and I feel now is the best time to share it.

Of course, whatever I am going to be saying will have me referring back to my wonderful community, The Dear 20 Something Community.

I get that it is good to have your life figured out and plan your life in the way you want it to be, but my dear friends, it becomes a performance when unnecessary pressure sets in.

I remember during the last hangout, the convener made a statement that you don't have to have a timeframe or limit for everything.

What if it doesn't go according to your plans?

I have come to realize that my 20s are more about becoming and discovering different parts and seasons of my life.

Of course, live a purposeful life, but avoid unnecessary comparison.

Maybe I should use myself as an example.

Stepping into 2026, I didn't really write my goals for the year. Or maybe I did? 😂 But I didn't write much.

Writing goals is good for coordination, but I didn't really write my goals this year, and I can tell you that I did certain things without feeling pressured.

Before I turned 20 this year, I remember asking myself, How would I achieve certain things people are achieving?

But looking at it now, I have learnt a lot of lessons.

In your 20s, you will hear statements like:

"By this age, you should have completed your studies."

"By this age, you must have gotten your first car, because if you haven't, you don't have evidence that you are really labouring."

"In your 20s, you must have figured out your entire life."

But life is not something you can figure out all at once.

If God allowed us to figure everything out at once, He knows we humans might not even learn to trust Him.

Of course, God gives us a blueprint for our lives, and we need to keep trusting and following Him to discover the next phase of our lives.

Achievements are good.

Seeing results is very good.

But it becomes unhealthy when you lose yourself in the process of trying to become what society has asked you to become.

Your 20s are for becoming and knowing yourself.

Many people, out of pressure, no longer work with God's blueprint but with the blueprint society has given them.

I understand that there is a place for doing the needful at the right time, but at the same time, don't lose yourself.

Dear Becomer,

Breathe...

Just breathe.

You might not have it all figured out.

Invest in your growth and become a better person.

It is good to have plans and personal goals that state what you would like to achieve at a particular age.

But it becomes unhealthy when we allow the world's blueprint to replace the blueprint and plan God has given us.

The Bible says, "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding."

My dear friends,

Keep trusting God. 🤍