How many times have I stared at the fan bracket on the ceiling?
How many times have I stared at the half-full bottle of insecticide?
How many times have I stared at the unused tablets of medicine?
But each time, I chose not to do something irreversible.
I chose not to let the pain and selfishness of the moment take over me.
I am stronger than I think.
I tried motivating myself.
I tried telling myself that things would get better.
I tried holding on.
But it’s not working anymore.
Oh Lord, it’s just not working anymore.
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