Why do I keep doing this to myself?

Getting hurt over and over again.

Forgiving, and always giving second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth… so many chances that I can’t even count anymore.

I keep telling myself, they will change.

Everyone grows up differently. I don’t know how they were raised, so maybe I shouldn’t judge them. Maybe I can help them.

“I can help them.”

“They will change.”

“They just need time and love.”

But what about me?

I keep hurting myself over and over because of how deeply I care about others.

Do they even feel what I feel?

Do they care?

They only come when they need something, and once they get it, they leave.

Why does that make me feel like I’m the bad person?

Don’t I deserve to be loved and cared for too?

Sometimes I wonder if relationships and friendships are all scams.

Is that true? Should I believe it?

No… because I’ve seen beautiful friendships and relationships before.

So why can’t I have something like that too?

Why does my heart always end up shattered?

Why do people keep disappointing me?

Sometimes I question myself.

Maybe I’m the problem.

Maybe I’m at fault.

But am I?

Still, I know I’ll keep believing.

I’ll keep loving.

I’ll keep caring.

And I’ll keep helping.

It’s who I am. I can’t help it.

But I know that one day, I’ll meet the right people.

And when I do, I’ll make sure I’m never the wrong person to them.