VALIDATION - by Ruthieee

Omo, I’m actually tired of you people ooo.... And yes, I’m quarrelling with everybody today because WHAT IS GOING ON?! The short ones want to be tall. The tall ones want to be shorter. Fair wants to be dark. Dark wants to be fair. No breast wants breast. Breast wants to reduce. No nyash wants nyash. Nyash doesn't want nyash. Skinny wants body. People with body want to be skinny. Flat tummy wants curves. Curvy girls want flat tummy. Small waist wants more waist. Big waist wants small waist. Small lips want bigger lips. Big lips want smaller lips. Round face wants sharp face. Sharp face wants fuller cheeks. Straight hair wants curls. Curly hair wants straight hair. Long hair wants to be short. Short hair wants to grow overnight. 😭 Small nose wants a smaller nose. Big nose wants to disappear completely. Somebody is looking at their stretch marks and crying. Another person is looking at somebody else's stretch marks and wishing they had those exact marks. AHHHHHHHHH! 😭 WHAT. DO. YOU. PEOPLE. WANT?! And before you say, “It’s my body, I can do whatever I want,” yes, you can. But I just wish we would ask ourselves WHY we want to change so many things about ourselves. Because sometimes, it's not even because we don't like the body. It's because somebody made us feel like the body isn't good enough. A comment. A joke. A picture on Instagram. A TikTok trend. A man saying, “I like fair girls.” A woman saying, “Real men like thick girls.” Someone telling you that your legs are too skinny. Someone laughing at your nose. Someone calling you too dark. And slowly, slowly, you start believing them. Then you stand in front of the mirror and start fighting yourself. “I need to lose weight.” “I need to add weight.” “I need to bleach.” “I need to get bigger breasts.” “I need to get nyash.” “I need to change my face.” For whattttt? 😭 Especially this bleaching thing. Please, who told you that your natural skin is something you should be ashamed of? Why are you destroying your skin just because somebody convinced you that lighter means prettier? You were dark and beautiful. You are dark and beautiful. You don't need to become three shades lighter before you deserve compliments. And this is not me saying you shouldn't take care of your appearance. Please, take care of yourself. Use good skincare. Eat well. Exercise if you want to. Dress nicely. Do your hair. Do whatever makes you happy. But there's a difference between taking care of yourself and hating yourself into changing. That difference matters. Because imagine spending your whole youth trying to become someone else, only to look back years later and realise you never gave yourself a chance to enjoy the person you actually were. 🥺 And you know what hurts me the most? Somebody is praying to have what you are complaining about. Somebody with no hair is praying for the hair you're tired of combing. Somebody who can't gain weight is praying for the body you're calling “too big.” Somebody who lost their breasts after a health struggle is praying for the breasts you're ashamed of. Somebody who has scars is wishing they could have the skin you're busy covering. Somebody who lost a part of their body would give anything just to have a body that functions the way yours does. And here you are... Standing in front of the mirror every morning, picking yourself apart. “This one is too big.” “This one is too small.” “I don't like this.” “I wish I had her body.” My dear, abeg. 😭 When did existing become a competition? When did we stop looking at ourselves with love? When did we start believing that everybody has to fit into one particular definition of beautiful? There is nothing wrong with wanting to improve yourself. But please don't let the internet convince you that you are a project that is never finished. You don't need to keep fixing yourself just because there is always another trend. Today it's slim waist. Tomorrow it's big bum. Next week it's slim face. Next month it's something else. If you keep chasing every trend, you will chase yourself away. And I really, really want young people to understand this. You are going to grow older. Your body will change. Your face will change. Your skin will change. Your breasts will change. Your tummy will change. Your hair will change. That's life. Please don't spend all your time hating the version of you that exists today because you're waiting for a “better” version tomorrow. Love yourself now. Not when you're fairer. Not when you're slimmer. Not when you're thicker. Not when you finally have the body you've been wishing for. NOW. Because this body has carried you through things nobody knows about. This face has cried tears nobody saw. These legs have walked through days you thought you wouldn't survive. This skin has been with you through everything. Please, treat yourself with some kindness. And to everyone who has been made to feel ugly because they don't fit a certain beauty standard... You are not ugly. You are just being taught to look at yourself through somebody else's eyes. Unlearn it. Please. Because honestly, it pains me seeing young people hate themselves this much. 😭 WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANTTTTT?! Na only one life we get o. 😭😂 Please, enjoy yourself small. Look in that mirror and say, “I like me.” Even if you don't believe it fully yet. Start there. Shalom! ❤️

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