Me

Me

A wedding invitation was brought to me with only Muhammad written on it.

I took my pen and wrote Mr. in front.

"Mr. Muhammad!" I called out loud.

Me

Me

They said, "Sit down. The food is for everyone."

When it got to my turn, the bowl had passed to the next person.

I dragged the food sharer back.

"My own never reach."

Me

Me

The dispatch rider said,

"Please hold on. I'm a few minutes away."

Me: "Okay."

I immediately went downstairs because he fit reach my house before me.

Me

Me

I got to an event and my chair was at the back.

I carried it to the front.

Someone asked,

"Why did you move your chair?"

Me: "God didn't create me for back seat."

Me

Me

I got to a business meeting.

They said,

"Join those boys and carry the goods inside."

Me: "No. My position is security."

Me

Me

I went to Chicken Republic to buy fried rice and chicken.

They gave me one tiny piece of chicken.

Me: "Abeg, change am. I no be small pikin."

Me

Me

At the bank they said,

"Oga, join the back of the queue."

Me: "No wahala."

Then I checked well and realized the front queue was for my transaction.

I quietly relocated.

Me

Me

They handed everyone a bottle of malt.

They gave me the smallest one.

Me: "Bring the chairman size."

Me

Me

I entered a bus.

The conductor shouted,

"Oga, squeeze."

Me: "Na space I go squeeze, no be my destiny."

Me

Me

For group pictures they said,

"Tall people at the back."

Me: "No problem."

I stood where my face could still be seen.

History no remember hidden faces.

Me

Me

Someone introduced everybody with their titles.

When it got to me, he simply said,

"Muhammad."

Me: "Complete the introduction. Respect no dey use abbreviation."

Me

Me

They cut cake and gave me the smallest slice.

Me: "Increase am. Celebration no be sample."

Me

Me

Life is funny.

Many Nigerians will reject a small piece of chicken.

Fight for a better seat.

Correct how their name is addressed.

And refuse the smallest bottle.

Yet, the same people accept small dreams.

Small standards.

Small salaries.

Small respect.

Small versions of themselves.

If you can reject a small piece of chicken,

learn to reject a small life too.