My passion or my bills? 😩💔 - by Temmytellsbrandstories

Omo ehnnn.... Shey na like this I wan take continue with my life? "Bisiiiii, are you deaf? Why are you sitting down? Can't you see we have a lot of customers to attend to?"If I lose money ehnnn, you sef go lose your job. I was tasty, I just wanted to drink water ma. Do you think you deserve water? Common get your ass here and attend to my customers........ That's the story of my life. My name is Bisi, a recent graduate of philosophy.No be say I no sabi book oo, but you know the country we are now, you have to have 5 years of experience before you get the chance to submit your CV. I came from a struggling family and of course you know what it means to be a graduate in a Nigerian home? FEND FOR YOURSELF! Nobody even needs to announce it, the moment you graduate they just assume your certificate comes with an automatic job. Life after school no be joke oo. 😭😭 That was how I found myself working in a canteen, attending to customers morning till night. And my boss, she just shout my name like I owe her money. But I don't have a choice, i just didn't want to sit at home doing nothing, I just needed to find something to do to earn my own money. But sometimes, when I stood behind that counter, watching people come in and go out, I would start thinking about my life.Omo ehnnn, I no suppose dey here ooo.Me, wey get big dreams!I want to own a fashion house. where people would walk in, choose their fabrics, discuss their designs with me. Giving this Veeke James vibes. I just want to own my own brand and my space. Kaiiiii.......I don't even have a sewing machine let alone money to rent a shop. 😭I find myself checking the prices of sewing machine, after seeing the price I close the app and go back to my reality. Olorun ooo 😭 Even dreaming needs a capital. And the funny thing is, I don't lack ideas, I can spend hours imagining what designs I would create, how my clients would be treated and what my fashion house would look like. But when I open my account balance I just stop dreaming. I have come to accept my reality, come back home tired, eat and sleep. I wake up and repeat the same circle. And sometimes, I wonder…What if I spend the next five years working for people and never get the opportunity to build the life I actually want?But then, another question comes.If I leave this job to pursue my passion, what will I eat?Who will pay my bills?Will my passion send me transport fare when I need to go somewhere?Will my dream fashion house pay for the food I'm eating today?Because as much as I love fashion, hunger doesn't understand passion. 😭And that's where I'm stuck.I don't want to abandon my dreams, but I can't pretend that money isn't important.I don't want to spend my whole life working for somebody else, but I also don't want to make a decision that will leave me stranded.Sometimes, I wish someone would just tell me where to start.Not the usual “Believe in yourself” advice.Not “Just start small” without explaining how.I need someone to tell me how to build something meaningful when all I have is a dream, a little experience, and almost nothing in my account.Because honestly, I'm tired. Do I keep chasing my passion, or do I focus on paying my bills first?Omo, if you were in my shoes, wetin you go do? 🥹💔

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