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10
Ara Bambi
Student @ Federal University of Technology, Akure
Student @ Federal University of Technology, Akure
FREE
<p><br/></p><p>I listened to a song today.</p><p><br/></p><p>And well I heard a lot in it.</p><p><br/></p><p>It got me thinking about myself.</p><p><br/></p><p>My flaws.</p><p><br/></p><p>My problems.</p><p><br/></p><p>"All the secrets that keep me in chains"</p><p><br/></p><p>"All the damage that might make me dangerous"</p><p><br/></p><p>Someone once told me I act unbothered.</p><p><br/></p><p>She said it was a way for me to push away my problems and never talk about them.</p><p><br/></p><p>But it wasn't good for me because was just prolonging my suffering.</p><p><br/></p><p>She said maybe I was doing something bad or I had done something bad in the past.</p><p><br/></p><p>Because what else would keep me up at night.</p><p><br/></p><p>Make me scared when I sleep.</p><p><br/></p><p>Make me not want to think of anything for the fear of what thinking might do.</p><p><br/></p><p>True?</p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe so.</p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe not.</p><p><br/></p><p>What if I try fighting what I'm always running from?</p><p><br/></p><p>But what am I running from?</p><p><br/></p><p>I don't know.</p><p><br/></p><p>But still.</p><p><br/></p><p>I can't fix my flaws if I never face them.</p><p><br/></p><p>"What if I find a way to escape it".</p><p><br/></p><p>Maybe then I'd be free.</p><p><br/></p><p>"Let the past be the past till it's weightless".</p><p><br/></p><p>I'm in my head a lot.</p><p><br/></p><p>Wrestling with my thoughts.</p><p><br/></p><p>They always win.</p><p><br/></p><p>And they keep pointing me towards nowhere.</p><p><br/></p><p>They live rent free in my head.</p><p><br/></p><p>If I fix what's broken maybe then I'd be free.</p><p><br/></p><p>But what would it take?</p><p><br/></p><p>What would it cost?</p><p><br/></p><p>Do I become free by confronting or changing the things that hurt me?</p><p><br/></p><p>Or should I just accept and live with my demons?</p><p><br/></p><p>Do I become free by accepting that my scars are part of me.</p><p><br/></p><p>"Darkness and Harmony".</p><p><br/></p><p>"Nothing but the proof of what I am".</p><p><br/></p><p>The worst of where I came from.</p><p><br/></p><p>"Patterns I'm ashamed of".</p><p><br/></p><p>Things even </p><p>I don't understand.</p><p><br/></p><p> (Sighs in pa pa su pe😮💨)</p><p><br/></p>
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