MOSES AND THE ISREALITES ( GEN Z EDITION) - by Adanne 💕 Chisom 🌺

SCENE: THE WILDERNESS RITA:Omoh, God is good ooo! CHRISTIE:Fr! STRENGTH:You no see how the sea just divide nii? ADANNE:Like, guy! I was shocked ooo! FEMI:Yawns. VICTOR:Wetin do you? FEMI:Omoh, I’m thirsty ooo. SEGUN:Na true oo. Person no see water drink. LILIY:Like, fr! The thing don tire me ooo. NIYI:My mama talk say if we reach Marah, we go check if we fit see water drink joor. Before person kpai ooo. EVERYONE:Hissssss. They all carry their loads on their heads and begin moving slowly. AT MARAH After walking for what feels like forever, they finally reach Marah. STRENGTH:Finally! Water! Everyone rushes towards the stream. VICTOR:Eeeeeee! Gawwwd! Shey na agbo be this one now? Abi wetin be this?! NIYI:Comes forward.Wetin happen na? VICTOR:Eje, come drink first. Niyi bends down and takes a sip. NIYI:WTF!!! He spits it out. LILIY:Guy, dey calm down! Dey scream joor. Wetin do you nah? She looks at him. LILIY:See as whole man dey scream because of water! NIYI:So as I con be man, make I no complain say I dey thirsty abi? VICTOR:Something dey do your head. Why you dey shout? NIYI:I go still beat you one day! Victor grabs Niyi by the shirt. ADANNE:Ah-ah! Una don start again?! A fight erupts. MOSES ARRIVES UNCLE MOSES:God abeg! These children again. He looks towards the heavens. UNCLE MOSES:Lord, what do I do with these people? The Lord shows him a tree. UNCLE MOSES:Ah. Okay. He takes the tree and throws it into the water. Everyone watches. UNCLE MOSES:Una don finish fighting? Make una drink. He tastes the water. UNCLE MOSES:E don sweet. ETHAN:Bro, no dey talk that kind thing. Drink water on top empty stomach? KEMI_LI:Na true oo. Shey Egypt no wan come better now? Person dey hungry ooo. ALBARKA:Like, damn! I’m hungry. The hunger is massive. I’m starving. NINA:The hunger never serious. Na why you dey speak big-big grammar. She rolls her eyes. HANNAH:Omoh, this one na death sentence ooo. PRINCESS:You no go like calm down? Na only food you sabi. She looks around. PRINCESS:I’m sure Uncle Moses is figuring something out. STRENGTH:Why you no go support am? No be your uncle? Looks at Moses. STRENGTH:Nepotism sha. PRINCESS:No, you won't talk to me that way. THAT EVENING UNCLE MOSES:Gather around, please. Everyone reluctantly gathers. Pearl rolls her eyes and walks tiredly towards the congregation. She looks at Philip. Philip winks. Pearl rolls her eyes. RAKEEM:To Philip.Omoh, that girl never gree for you. PHILIP:As I toast her, she talk say I no get sense. Say shey na inside hunger I dey ask girl out. RAKEEM:Laughs. Uncle Moses clears his throat. UNCLE MOSES:Make una no vex abeg. Everyone becomes quiet. UNCLE MOSES:The Lord has heard all your murmuring, and He will perform wonders tomorrow. EVERYONE:Tomorrow? UNCLE MOSES:Yes. Make una no vex. Make una go sleep. Pause. UNCLE MOSES:Tomorrow, una go chop. EVERYONE:Grumbles. STRENGTH:Nawa ooo. LILIY:Which kain pattern be this biko Kwanu? Everyone eventually goes to sleep. THE NEXT MORNING The Israelites wake up. FEMI:Wetin dey fall so? ADANNE:Wait... RITA:Na manna ooo! STRENGTH:Omoh! I talk am say God go do am! CHRISTIE:God is a talk-and-do Man! STRENGTH:That's on period! PRINCESS:Clock it! Everyone begins gathering the manna. HANNAH:Omoh, this thing sweet ooo! LILIY:Like fr it is goated ALBARKA:Delicious as fuck! NINA: see them , na only food Dem sabi . AT THE OTHER END Philip walks closer to Pearl. PHILIP:Don't worry, Heaven Baby. I will help you pick yours. Just sit down, asanwa. You no deserve to dey stress yourself. Pearl blushes. She sits down. Philip begins gathering manna for her. After a while, he sits beside her. PHILIP:Ummm... PEARL:Hmm? PHILIP:Are you still thinking about what I told you? PEARL:Yes. Philip smiles. PEARL:But I want to tell you something. PHILIP:Okay... PEARL:I'm dating Rakeem. Silence. Philip freezes. PHILIP:Which Rakeem? PEARL:Your friend. Philip slowly turns his head towards Rakeem. Rakeem is sitting a short distance away, happily eating Manna like person wey no get problem. Philip's face turns pale. He looks back at Pearl. Then at Rakeem. Then back at Pearl. PHILIP:Shiittt... TBC

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