Wandering Thoughts - by Big Dee

I just want to be human for once. I know the Bible says that after death comes judgment. But I don't want to preach about death today. I just want to think. Last week, I was passing somewhere behind YabaTech. There is a burial home there, or a funeral home, I think. I can't even remember the exact name. I was passing by, and I saw graves. And I don't know why, but I kept looking. A church member recently lost her mother, and I had seen a video from the burial. I watched them pour sand over her. Dust to dust. It looked like a dream. And then I had this thought. What if it were me? I don't pray for that, not now. God forbid.😅 But what if? Would my friends be able to reach out to me again? Would they still talk to me? How would I feel? Would I feel lonely? I know what I believe about the afterlife, but I also know that there are things I don't know. I don't think the afterlife is something I should sit here and imagine as though I understand it. I don't. But as I passed those graves, I kept looking. I saw names. Some had titles. Some had degrees. Some had things written beside their names that probably meant so much to them while they were alive. And I thought, do they still remember? Do they remember that they had certificates? Do they remember the schools they attended? Do they remember their friends? Do they remember the things they worked so hard to achieve? Do they remember the people who loved them? I thought about people who post about their siblings or family member after they die. People who still say, "I miss my brother." People who call their mothers every day and suddenly have to get used to the phone not being answered anymore. "Mom is not picking up again." Would that be me one day? Would someone call my name and then remember that I can't answer? Would my friends still want to tell me things? Would they miss hearing my voice? And then I wondered about the other side. Do they want to see us too? Do they miss us? Do they know that we miss them? Is there any way to reach out to someone again after they are gone? How does it even feel? I don't know. Maybe that's why it feels so unreal. Because it is unreal to me. And yet, it is real. People are here today and gone tomorrow. People whose names once belonged to full lives are now written on stones. People who once had plans, friends, certificates, families, worries, dreams and ordinary Tuesdays are now people we talk about in the past tense. And one day, I will be someone's past tense too. That's a strange thing to think about. Maybe I need to see a doctor. Or maybe I just need to stop thinking so much. I don't know. Just crazy thoughts, you know. I just want to be human for once.

Other insights from Big Dee

Contributor Points

Points-to-Coupons

Referral Earning