THE TRUTH WE ALL IGNORED!!!

“Fathy!!!”

If you are wondering how Faith turned Fathy, that's the fate I get to live with.

My Aunty calls me Faithy, some call me Fatho, some call me Fah Fah, while some call me Fatimoh, while some call me Lepa mi.

Emabinuuu ooo motigbeyinfo.

Back to our discussion.

“Fathy.”

“Ma,” I replied.

This “ma” has been the most recent word that I’ve been saying lately since I got back from school.

“Don’t do any chores,” she said.

E shock you abiii?

E shock me too ooo.

I began to wonder if trumpet was about to sound.

Don’t do any chores in an African home kehhh?

“Don’t do any chores,” she repeated. “Someone is coming to do it.”

At that point, it dawned on me that not only had my admission to university changed some things in my absence, my Aunty had also decided that, in order for her to live long and not be diagnosed with some stress related illness, if there’s anything like that, she needed to make a change. She decided to hire someone who comes three times a week to clean the house. Mondays, Wednesdays and Saturdays.

For those already thinking I won a jackpot... you can see I still have about four more days to do the cleaning.

So don't wish to be like me.

My Aunty simply decided it was best for her to focus on the kids and let money sort out other things.

Why am I telling you all this?

Because I’m getting at something.

“Faith, go and open the gate.”

Because in our compound, the gate has a lock and everyone has a key. If the person you want to meet isn’t picking your call, or you don’t have a key...

You will sleep outside.

So I went to open the gate.

“Good morning.”

I turned to see who greeted me, only to find her head going down a bit, meaning she bowed while saying the good morning.

She Is beautiful and has a small stature. I would have said we were of the same body frame, but I’m taller than her and, I think, bigger than her by a few inches.

I returned the greeting immediately after scrutinising her.

Later that day, she washed some of the clothes I had kept in the bathroom, spread them and packed them.

Did that move me?

Not really.

Then what hit me the most?

The day she came and was washing clothes, I happened to come in at the exact point where she was staring outside the window.

You could see the pain in her eyes.

The tiredness.

But she had been deprived of options.

Did it end there?

No.

While working, she made a call, asking about the wellbeing of her children, hoping they were fine.

Then she went back to work.

When she speaks to my Aunty:

“Yes ma.”

“Okay ma.”

When she greets her, she goes down almost to her knees.

I can swear they are of the same age, if not almost.

She tries to give me the respect she can, but I have stylishly ignored all of it from the onset.

I greet her before she even thinks of greeting me.

I respond “ma” at every chance I get.

She didn’t take her youth seriously.

She settled for the bare minimum.

I’m sure she wasn’t serious during her twenties.

Shhhhhh...

Your thoughts are loud and I can hear them clearly.

I know that’s what most of you are thinking.

But do you know that uncle whose corporate wear you love seeing every day?

That suitcase and wristwatch you were envious of?

The one whose kind of job made you think, “God, I wish I had that kind of life.”

He can be a gateman on the highland.

“Is a lie jorrr...

Okay, let me share with you a personal experience.

I used to learn hairstyling.

My boss no small at all.

She does home services for big women, half casts, white people who came to Nigeria for a short stay...

She nor small.🥰😎

One day, I was privileged to go with the team to Ikeja, to a very big hotel, to attend to a client.

We ordered a ride and when we got there, a man opened the car door for us to step down.

After we got down, he bowed with so much intentionality and said,

“Welcome here.”

Guess what?

He was dressed in a well tailored, well ironed suit.

His shoes?

Confirm leather and well polished.

He was wearing a nice tie and a beautiful wristwatch.

We got there around 1 pm.

We left around 6 pm.

He was the one who opened the door for us when we were leaving too, just so you know how long he had been there.

At the reception, the receptionists didn’t sit.

You couldn’t even spot a chair behind their desk.

I remember returning home and telling one of my friends what I saw.

And she said something that made me think in another direction.

“Will I love to build something like this? Do I love the system around it?”

She told me that not everyone will make it to the top.

The world needs a balance.

And that balance comes from one person serving and another being the boss.

We can never be equal.

There has to be a balanceee!

Then she asked me,

“Do you know how much they are getting paid to maintain that job?”

I thought about it.

She was right.

At the end of the day, there has to be a balanceee!

Yes, I have smart friendssss... Story for another dayyy.

I’m telling you for free, those who come to the hotel are wealthy ones.

The ones you call old money.

They wear their shorts, palm slippers and, most importantly, that expensive wristwatch.

Now, practical practice.

I want you to try something.

Stretch out your palm.

You see those lines in between your fingers?

Make every one of them equal.

Make every lane the same.

Is it possible?

No!

Some people, no matter how much they stretch, will always be a servant.

And before you come for me, listen to what I’m actually saying.

That you got it.

That you made it.

That you found it easy.

Doesn’t mean everybody else is lazyyyy.

Where am I getting at?

You can be serious with your twenties and still be a servant.

The world isn’t principled.

It doesn’t have a manual.

You can do it all.

Work it all.

Work your ass off.

And still beg for crumbs to eat at the table.

Why?

Because the world is not designed for everybody to compete at the same level.

Don’t be deceived.

The world is not kind, and it never will be.

The painful thing is that we were lied to growing up.

They told us “The sky is enough for everyone.”

The sky is not enough for all of us to fly through ittttt!

It is a lie.

And if you keep believing it, it will murder you before your time.

Some will always be free.

Some will always remain caged.

Y’all remember Maya Angelou’s poem, right?

I know you will say,

“If you are serious and decide to make it, you will.”

But not everyone who is serious ends up at the top.

Some people work hard and still only manage to survive.

Some people are intelligent and still get overlooked.

Some people make all the right decisions and life still hands them the wrong cards.

And some people?

They are not lazy.

They are not unserious.

They are simply standing on a different part of the ladder.

Get it in your head that the sky is not enough for all the birds to fly in it.

There are systems designed to bring birds down.

“He is manipulating me.”

“They did this.”

“They did that.”

Shhhhh...

If you were given a chance, who says you wouldn't manipulate others too?

Maybe the problem is that we have been taught to look at the person beneath us and call them lazy, while looking at the person above us and calling them lucky.

Maybe we need to admit that life is not as fair as the stories we were told.

Do I always feel pity for the woman that comes over to our home?

Yes.

Can I change her situation?

No.

Can she change it?

I honestly don't know.

Can you still try, even when you are not sure of the results?

Yes.

Who knows? It might favour you.

Because what else can we do?

We try.

We stretch.

We climb.

We pray.

We keep moving.

And maybe, just maybe, one day the ladder will shift in our favour.

But until then...

Breaking news: The world is unprincipled!!!

There is no manual.

No promise that hard work will always be rewarded.

No guarantee that the most deserving person will get the seat at the table.

And perhaps the most dangerous lie we were ever told was that the world owes all of us the same opportunity simply because we are all under the same sky.

We are under the same sky.

But we are not standing on the same ground.

And maybe...

you are not the most innocent bird in the sky.