From The Bad Boys to Men of God - by Oluwatoyin Odunuyi

Dear Beautiful one,Let’s get in our feelings quickly before the Monday stress starts, and yeah, I’m talking about romance.If you had asked 19-year-old me what my type was, I would have said, ‘A bad boy.’Don’t start judging me. So I watched a lot of telenovelas, and growing up, I saw how the good girl would always disobey her parents and go out with the guy who rode a motorcycle, had forearm tattoos, and, most of the time, was in a dangerous gang with street cred. Most of the time, he was named ‘Oscar’ or Leonardo’Hmmm, good and naive times.So, yes. I watched that and thought it was cute. I fantasised about my father telling me,” Toyin, you must not go out with this guy,” and, in all dramatics, I would respond to him in tears,” But Daddy, I love him”Then I would rush to my room, crying, and then think of an escape with the bad boy.Hmmm, someone say ‘stupidity.’But yes, my vibe then was bad boys, and it didn’t help, because the guys I liked then were ‘bad boys’; you know what they say about good girls needing a bad boy.Yeah, so, that foolishness went on.I started noticing some changes in my life last year; somehow, my type shifted from bad boys to men of God. Hold on, let me explain. God can work on you in ways that change your preferences. Last year, I vowed to take my spiritual life seriously, and God bombarded me with instructions, so I got to know Him intimately.I sorted out who I wanted to be with God and who I wanted to end up with.Now, let’s briefly talk about a man of God. Oh, sweet Jesus.Many things are attractive to me, but a man of God will always be in the top ten. A man who’s close to God is attractive. You’re telling me that you fast, you have consecrations, you prayyyy, you are sold out to God, and you’re being a blessing to others.Damn, in Kevin hart’s voice. But oh God, yes, a man of God.However, we need to have a quick family meeting about what that phrase actually means in the real dating world, because over the years, I have noticed the definition can get a little blurry.A man of God is not someone who uses the Holy Spirit to ghost you as a legitimate communication strategy. It is not someone who can quote fifteen scriptures in a row but somehow doesn’t know how to apologise when he is wrong. Don’t be misguided.But I’m not going to talk about that. There are many sermons on choosing the right one. I suggest all the Love Code sermons at Celebration Church International.But yes, some of us have reached the age where marriage is knocking on the door, and I want to say that it's important to talk to God about the kind of person you want. I constantly tell God I need someone who can honour my purpose; I dream of my partner wearing a shirt that says ‘Toyin’s biggest fan’ at my event, while he makes sure everything is okay for my big day.I dream of praying with him and speaking light and encouragement into his life whenever he gets frustrated, because a man who confides in you about his trouble? Whoosh and glory!Again, I have a wild imagination.I dream of a partner who cares deeply about my role as a caregiver to my brother with special needs. Apparently, many siblings feel that way; may God answer our prayers.But back to my point, talk to God about it, because God is the master love doctor. I have a married friend, and every time I see her and her husband, I blush because they were a match in heaven. I still think their wedding hashtags should have been ‘A match ordained by God”But that would have been hard to put on printing materials,Yes, so that’s it. Talk to God about that special one, and trust that he listens and will deliver all the good things that you want. I say good things, because some of you are waiting for unrealistic things; for example, I want a basketball player who is also a doctor during the day, with forearm tattoos. From where to where?So the basketball player will now come and wake me up at 5 a.m. to work out. Biko, as how?But yes, talk to God about that partner, and also be the partner you want others to be. No sense waiting for a man of God when you’re not a woman of God. So that when the Man of God is destroying the kingdom of darkness in the night, and you’re confused.My dear, will you get uppppp?So talk to God, and listen to what he says. Some of you have been told you will marry pastors; you cannot escape it. Some of you will even be pastors. You cannot run away from God’s will.So, I congratulate you on that marital destiny ordained by God, and possibly, your ordination. Receive it in Jesus’ name! Touch!Also, I’m led to say: don’t worry about the kind of partner you want, or about your dating season. Sometimes I cry out to God about my marital destiny, but sometimes I’m settled because I know there is still work to be done. And I can’t just marry anyone based on how loud your tongue game is, or how tall you are, or how big your hands are (if you don’t understand, forget about it).Basically, honey, you see all that I have going on; I have to choose carefully.So, powerful men and women, don’t be too discouraged. God will give you someone you'll love, someone who will love and take care of you the way Christ takes care of the church, and that’s on period.Think of your waiting season like this. Powerful people deserve to be with powerful people, and for that to happen, God needs to settle things on both ends.I can’t wait to rejoice with you as you find that special one God sends.And to all the single men of God doing God’s work, you have a huge fan here. I said singleeee. Emphasis on singleeee. Please don’t koba me because thunder will strike my eyes.Yeah, finally. Take care, beautiful and powerful one, and do what God has asked you to do.With humour and high standards,Your lover girl and WOG, Twi-Twi.

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