How I chooses to live

It is not that I can see it all, it is not that I can't tell but I choose to keep mum. I pretend I am blind to the things that should be seen , I pretend I am deaf to the things that should known . This is how I choose to live my life . You must be wondering what exactly is she talking about ? Well let me tell you.I am talking about the danger that surrounds but I refuse see.I am talking about the people around me that I secretly fear , not because I am afraid of them but because I am aware of what PEOPLE can do.I am talking about God's grace that surrounds me that I secretly nod to.I am talking about the false happiness in the midst of uncertainty.I am talking about the hope that I AM NOT NEXT.You know for a very long time now , I have been in a flight or fight mode.Even in a peaceful silence , I am always suspicious. I don't trust peace and I am scared silence but the irony is that even when it actually gets loud and busy , somewhere in my head , I am always ready to run.Too much noise scares me, little noise keeps me on my toes.I imagine the unimaginable, I constantly keep looking for escape routes,wherever I am.I turn to Sherlock Holmes when I see something suspicious .I keep trying to solve the impossible, just like how can a person escape a room with no windows.I freight, a lot.Nevertheless, somewhere in between, I am a warrior and I will fight it all- maybe it is this illusion that keeps me from knowing peace.Remember I said , " this is how I choose to live" but at the end of the day , it is a lie. This is not how I choose to live or how I want to live rather THIS IS HOW I HAVE BEEN FORCED TO LIVE.POEM" VroommmmThis is the sound I make when I moveBut I remember times when I made little sound despite moving long distances Hi, I am bus and this is how I live now. Faded , that is what I am nowBut there was a time when you could see my ink in the darkHi , I am pen and this is how I live now. Broken and shivering is my present selfBut there was a time when I shone the brightestHi, I am bulb and this is how I live now . Expensive liquor,Exotic and priceless, that was my pastNowadays people barely remember meAll I am is broken Hi, I am bottle and this is how I live now. Dominant, the highest being God's perfect creation God's own image Mankind is my name I don't know where I stand." - Ayobami Nollah I write poems , do well to enjoy this piece from me.

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