66 - by Catalyst ✍️

Imagine a woman who has been married to the same man for 66 years. For 66 years, she has stayed with him through good times and bad times. She has celebrated his wins, endured his failures and defended him when people spoke badly about him. She loves him. She really does. But one day, she looks around the house and gets tired. The roof still leaks. There is barely enough light. The road outside is bad. The hospital is not reliable. Her children are graduating from school but are not sure what kind of future is waiting for them. She has waited for things to get better, but instead, things keep getting harder. So she tells her husband, “I think I need to leave.” The neighbours immediately start talking. “After 66 years?” “After everything you have been through together?” “Is this not betrayal?” “Who will stay and fix the marriage if everybody leaves?” She tries to explain that she still loves him. She is not leaving because she hates him. She is leaving because she wants a better life. That woman is Nigeria's young people, and the husband is Nigeria. For 66 years, we have been in this relationship called independence. Every October 1st, we bring out the green and white, post patriotic messages and remind ourselves that Nigeria is great. But behind all the celebrations is a question we don't talk about enough: what does Nigeria owe us, and what do we owe Nigeria? We often ask what Nigerians should do for Nigeria. Maybe we should first ask what Nigeria should do for Nigerians. Nigeria owes us security. It owes us good roads, working hospitals, better schools, electricity, good transportation and an economy where people can actually find opportunities. It owes young people a country where working hard does not feel useless. Of course, Nigeria cannot promise everyone success. Life does not work that way. But it should at least give people a fair chance. If I study, I should have a chance to use what I studied. If I start a business, the system should not make it harder than it already is. If I become a doctor, engineer, teacher, researcher or anything else, I should not feel like leaving the country is the only way my work can have value. This is why I don't think “Japa” should automatically be called betrayal. Sometimes people leave because they want better opportunities. Sometimes they leave because they are tired. Sometimes they leave to study. Sometimes they leave because they want to feel safe. Sometimes they simply want to see what life looks like somewhere else. Leaving does not always mean you hate where you came from. But Nigerians also owe Nigeria something. We cannot complain about corruption and still look for our own way to cheat the system. We cannot complain about bad leaders and then refuse to vote or care about what happens around us. We cannot destroy public property because we think it belongs to nobody. Nigeria is not built only by the people in government. It is also built by the teacher who actually teaches, the student who refuses to cheat, the business owner who treats workers well, the civil servant who refuses a bribe, the person who creates jobs and the person who helps someone learn a skill. Even a Nigerian living abroad can still contribute. They can support their family, start a business back home, invest, teach, share knowledge or create opportunities for people in Nigeria. So what Nigerians owe Nigeria is not necessarily their physical presence. We owe Nigeria our contribution. This is also why I don't completely agree when people say Nigeria has nothing to offer. Nigeria has given us our culture, our identity, our education, our relationships, our experiences and many of the things that shaped who we are. Some Nigerians have left to study and later returned with what they learned. Others left and still found ways to help people back home. Leaving can be part of the journey, and staying can also be part of the journey. The problem is when leaving becomes the only option people can imagine. If every doctor, engineer, researcher, entrepreneur and talented young person eventually leaves, Nigeria loses something. But we also have to ask why they are leaving in the first place. You cannot keep telling people, “Stay and fix Nigeria,” without giving them reasons to believe that staying is possible. It is like the woman in the marriage. You cannot tell her, “If you love your husband, stay,” without asking why she is tired in the first place. A relationship cannot work when only one person is expected to sacrifice. So, does a Nigerian have a responsibility to stay and help build Nigeria? I believe Nigerians have a responsibility to contribute to Nigeria, but that does not always mean staying physically. Someone can stay and build. Someone can leave and still contribute. What matters is that we don't completely turn our backs on the place we came from. Is leaving simply a rational decision when the system keeps failing you? Sometimes, yes. People have the right to look for better opportunities, safety, education and a better quality of life. Leaving does not automatically make someone a bad Nigerian. But we should also understand that when many skilled people leave, Nigeria loses people it needs. Are we losing the very people who could fix Nigeria? In some cases, yes. When doctors, engineers, lecturers, researchers and other skilled people leave, there is a gap. But leaving does not mean they can no longer help Nigeria. Many Nigerians abroad still support people and businesses back home. Some return with knowledge, some invest, some create jobs and some simply help their families survive. Is it unfair to put the burden of fixing Nigeria on ordinary Nigerians? Yes, when we expect ordinary people to solve problems they did not create and do not have the power to solve. Citizens have responsibilities, but the government also has a huge responsibility. We cannot blame a young person for wanting to leave when the system has given them very little reason to stay. At the same time, citizens should not use the failures of government as an excuse to do nothing for their communities. And how much should patriotism demand from us? Patriotism should demand that we care, contribute, act responsibly and try to make things better. It should not demand that we suffer just to prove that we love Nigeria. You can love Nigeria and leave. You can love Nigeria and stay. You can leave and come back. You can leave and still help people here. The real question is not always where you are. It is what you do with where you are. That woman in our story may leave her husband tomorrow. Maybe she will come back. Maybe she won't. But instead of standing and shouting, “After 66 years, you want to leave?” maybe the neighbours should ask the husband one simple question: “What have you done to make her want to stay?” That, to me, is the question Nigeria should answer at 66. Not just, “Why are our people leaving?” but, “Why have so many people started believing that their future is somewhere else?” Because the goal should not be to force Nigerians to stay. The goal should be to build a Nigeria where staying is a choice, not a punishment, not a sacrifice and not an escape, but simply a choice.

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