Dear beautiful self,

I know.

I know you've been tired.

The kind of tired that sleep doesn't always fix.

The kind that makes you stare at your ceiling for a little longer because, for once, you don't have the strength to think about tomorrow.

You've been carrying plenty.

And somehow, you've still been saying,

"I'm fine."

Because what else do we say when life is asking for more and our body is begging for a break?

Sometimes, you just want to disappear small.

Just enough to breathe without anybody asking,

"What's wrong?"

You want to put your phone on silent.

Close the door.

Drop everything.

And just...

be.

Can I just be?

My tired heart.

You've been feeling guilty for slowing down.

For not replying everybody.

For not being as productive as you planned.

For watching the days pass while you gather yourself.

But, beautiful self...

Rest is not a crime.

You don't have to earn the right to be tired.

You don't have to collapse before you're allowed to pause.

And you don't have to keep running simply because everybody else is running too.

There are seasons when you move.

There are seasons when you build.

And there are seasons when all you can do is breathe and say,

"Abeg, make I rest first."

And that's okay.

The world will survive your absence for a little while.

That dream you've been chasing?

It is not going anywhere.

That version of you you're trying so hard to become?

She's waiting for you to arrive wholesome.

So, please...

Don't be too hard on yourself.

You've survived days you never thought you'd get through.

You've smiled with a heavy heart.

You've shown up when you wanted to stay in bed.

You've kept going with only a little hope left in your pocket.

And look at you.

Still here.

Still becoming.

Still trying.

That's something.

You just need someone to tell you,

"You've done enough for today."

So, beautiful self...

Take the pressure off.

Drink your water.

Put your phone down.

Sleep.

Cry if you need to.

Laugh if you can.

Be quiet.

Take your time.

Tomorrow will come with its own wahala.

You don't have to solve tomorrow tonight.

For now...

breathe.

Let your shoulders fall.

Come back to yourself.

And when you're ready...

we go again.

Slowly this time.

But still forward.

Because becoming the woman you dream of being should not require you to abandon the woman you are today.

And, beautiful self...

I'm proud of you.

Even here.

Especially here.